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You see, Robert is also my friend and I don’t have too many friends anymore and I really like Robert quite a bit. And so I better not tell you OK? Because I know Robert would REALLY feel bad if I told you how everybody laughed at him and called him names and how Sister Mary Justin said he was almost as dumb as Jerome if that’s possible. And he would feel even badder if you told Jimmy Olsen about it. So I better not do it because I just can’t. So I hope you really understand.
      
YOUR FRIEND, JERRY
      
    PS: GOSH you shoulda seen it, Superman!
      

      
    DEAR SUPERMAN,
      
    I just read that story about you and Mr. Mxyzptlk! and I think he’s really neat. I like him better than anybody I ever read about in your comicbooks except for you and  Supergirl and Jimmy Olsen. And Robert likes him quite a bit too. And that’s why we’re writing this letter.
    You see, Superman, we don’t think Mr. Mxyzptlk! is really that bad even if he does make a lot of trouble for you and everybody else in Metropolis, Illinoise. Especially you. Because he does those things to have fun and not to hurt people or kill somebody. Because he isn’t real big and mean like Luthor is. In fact he’s about as little—I mean big—as I and Robert am. That’s why he’s a imp and not a person. He doesn’t do things like robbing banks or pushing Lois Lane out the window. He just does things like making cars drive up the side of skyscrapers and making all the water disappear from the swimming pool. He likes to make trouble because that’s just the way he is, not because he really LIKES to make trouble.
    And we think it’s really NEAT how he comes out of The Fifth Dimension where he lives with all the the other imps, and the only way you can send him back to his own Dimension is to make him spell his name backwords. And that’s the only way you can get rid of him because he’s magical and you can’t catch him. Because every time you try and grab him somebody writes POP! and he’s gone, just like that! He’s pretty smart. That’s why you can never trick him until the last page of the comicbook.
    I remember one time you tricked him by making him read the letters in his alphabet soup which turned out to be his name spelt backwords. I thought that was REALLY clever. That’s something I would of thought of. You’re really great, Superman! And Mr. Mxyzptlk! isn’t so bad as you think sometimes. Because EVERYbody likes to do tricks like that. Even me. Like one time I hid in the apple tree and waited for my cousin Connie to walk under and then I peed on her. The reason I did it was because she  always told my mom when I ran behind her house and pulled my pants down in front of cars going by. And another time I put a frog down Robert’s pants but I can’t do things like making cars drive up the side of Holy Redeemer School or turning Sister Mary Justin into a wart. So you don’t have to worry.
    And since Mr. Mxyzptlk! keeps coming back to this Dimension every 90 days I guess you’ll be busy enough trying to trick him and making him spell his name backwords. And so me and Robert are gonna help you OK? And our first idea is to pretend you are a blind person and you can even dress up like one with sun glasses and everything. And Mr. Mxyzptlk! won’t know it’s really you and so you could ask him to read you a story out of a old comicbook. And you could pick one where you already tricked him into spelling his name backwords. And then when he got to the end he’d disappear. Isn’t that good Ha-Ha?
     
Your PALS,
Jerry and Robert
      
    PS: If you don’t like that one then we’ll send you another one as soon as we think of it. Which should be pretty soon, so don’t worry.
      

    Dear Superman,
      
    Robert said to tell you that he didn’t really cry very much because Sister Mary Justin only hit him once. And besides it made some more freckles grow when the tears fell allover his face