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intimate orgasmic power.
    Relax. Lie on your back, sit up, use whatever position allows you to breathe easily, deeply, and restfully. Making sure you
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    have cleaned your hands in advance and are not wearing any perfume, rings, or bracelets that will slide up and down your arm, insert the tip of your little finger into your vagina just one-half of an inch (about one knuckle’s worth). Sensuously tighten your PC muscle around your fingertip and then relax it again, just as you did the flex and release in the previous exercises. Do twenty repetitions in this manner. See if you can insert your fingertip up to an inch (up to the second knuckle). Again, tighten and then release the PC muscle twenty times. Now see if you can insert your finger all the way up to the last knuckle. Again, flex and release for a series of twenty flexes.
    Work your way in this three phase per finger process through each finger on your band. If at any time you get nervous, stop, focus on your belly breathing, remind yourself that what you are doing is good and natural, and see if you can start again. If you feel pain or if these actions stimulate any fears or uncomfortable memories you might have of an incident in your past, stop immediately and do not start again until you have consulted with a physician, a therapist, or both.

    Babes in Sexual Toyland
    Before I started working as a professional sexual surrogate in the early 1980s, I had never used, let alone seen, a dildo. And neither had many of my surrogate peers, or nonsurrog-ate peers for that matter. Times have changed, however, and dildos, vibrators, and other sex toys are a part of many wo-men’s sexual lives. I don’t want to assume, however, that they have become part of yours so
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    I am going to take this opportunity to tell you about them. This is not a digression though, because afterward you are going to proceed with your exercises, this time incorporating the use of a dildo into your learning plan.
    When I was in high school, there was one boy in my class whose life was made a living hell because his father manu-factured sex toys. I must say that while I was not one of the active participants in the teasing that continually went on, I certainly did my share of snickering. Wherever that boy is today, let me tell you now, my dear I’m really sorry I ever laughed at you. Because what your father did, I’ve discovered in later years, was of immeasurable service to all of us who want to enjoy full sexual lives.
    Why am I telling you this anecdote from my childhood? Well, in spite of the various sexual revolutions that have transpired since my teens, many people today still do not understand the function of items like dildos and vibrators. You can just do an informal test with people you know if you want. I guarantee you will get many giggles at the mention of the subject, along with some pretty wacky explanations of what value sex toys have in our everyday lives. Some of the misguided beliefs I’ve heard in my time include:
    (1) sex toys are for “perverts,” (2) if your sex life was good you wouldn’t need sex toys, and (3) using sex toys will re-move the need for having sex with other people. Maybe you even believe, on some unconscious level, that one or more of these opinions are true. Let me give you some information, then, that might help you change your mind.
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    Show and Tell
    I’m going to tell you about both dildos and vibrators, even though the exercises to follow only make use of a dildo. I just think that because you may want to explore vibrators on your own, it would be good if you had some knowledge of their function and potential. Both dildos and vibrators are used to stimulate areas deep in the vagina that cannot be reached by hand. If you have never experimented with sex toys before, you will be surprised at what using them can do for you. While it is true that they can be used for