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partnership, not just dating or a relationship. You’re with him for the long haul, and you can’t wait to see what the future brings for you both.
     
    The mutual trust, respect and admiration you have for each other are the solid foundation of a strong, healthy and happy relationship. But, what happens when all that love gets in the bedroom? Not much, unfortunately.
     
    Oh, the sex is fine. You feel a connection with him that you’d only read about in books. So much of it feels so right, it’s like your bodies were made for each other – two puzzle pieces that together make the whole picture.
     
    But when it comes to the bedroom, sometimes too much respect can be a bad thing. Perhaps you feel a bit of timidity on his part. It can seem like he’s afraid to go too far with the passion he so obviously feels for you. Maybe he has balked when you’ve suggested something a little kinky.
     
    Meanwhile, you feel like you’re the one doing all the work, because although he knows your body well and makes you feel great, he’s still not touching that part of your sexuality that sends you into the stratosphere.
     
    What your man lacks, and what the bad boys of this world have, use and abuse, is the alpha male touch.
     
    What is an alpha male? He is all man. He knows what he wants, and he’s not afraid to get it. He calls the shots. And he knows how to make you feel like a woman. An alpha male is not an asshole, nor does he disrespect women.
     
    The problem is, your man is not going to magically become an alpha male. He’s not psychic! And when you have been in a relationship for a while, it can be terribly awkward to suddenly do something drastically different within the boundaries of that relationship.
     
    The good news is, though, that he can be the man you need him to be in the bedroom. He just needs a little direction to get him going. The key is communication – both verbal and non-verbal.
     
    Before you broach this subject, however, you have to know how to define exactly what it is you’re looking for. Let’s see if we can figure it out together.
     
    Some women want simply to have their men call the shots in bed. They want to feel like the man has the control, because it makes them feel more feminine. There can be something very seductive, and even titillating, about a man who knows exactly what he wants from a woman.
     
    Other women like alpha males in their beds because they want to feel, even if it’s just for those moments, like a sexual object. They’re tired of proving they’re worthy because of their brains or their power plays at work; they want to be worshipped for the goddesses they are!
     
    An even more intense level to which women want to take their desires is that of “rough sex.” While this in no way constitutes abuse, there can be some spanking, dirty talk, hair-pulling, clothes torn off or the old slamming-up-against-a-wall-and-having-sex-standing-up situation. They want to feel the hot passion that comes with a man ravishing them.
     
    Another, more psychological motivator behind this desire to be “man-handled,” in whatever way is best for you, can come from a need to be absolved of all responsibility for the pleasure you feel.
     
    We women grow up with the phrase, “be a good girl” burned into our brains from a very early age. A lot of times, it’s used as an admonishment when we’ve been acting out.
     
    Then, as we get older, the phrase takes on a whole new meaning – and it’s a sexual one. Being a “good girl” can mean dressing a certain way so as not to appear too slutty; not provoking boys, or being too aggressive; waiting to date, or make out, or as we get of age, have sex.
     
    And, now that we are women, this mindset is still reinforced by every possible corner of our society. Even “Sex and The City,” for all the talk about liberating the female sexually, still presented sex as something to be giggled over, and many of the ladies’ conversations were