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Sumerian...and
still, things get screwed up. This is surely why Sumeria is no
longer a viable civilization.”
    The doctor rested the shotgun on pew next to
the shoulder of the still-snoring Congressman.
    “ Well no matter. You're dead, too, whoever
you are. Hopefully the Eater of Worlds will take you and not Rose.
We've come this far – it's worth a shot, right? I really, really
want to at least kill all of you, especially since I'm now a giant
fish-monster.” it admitted, and then bellowed a bellow that
filled the chapel and compressed everyone's hearts inside their
bodies.
    “You're right, it is worth a shot.”
quipped the doctor, nudging the blonde woman next to him in the
ribs. She stood up and ran to her right, screaming at the top of
her lungs. She only got a few steps before tripping over the
outstretched head of Mr. Sunglasses, who had been quietly scoping
her legs out while again hiding under a pew. The yelling, running,
and tripping attracted the demon's attention, giving the Doctor an
unimpeded shot at its solitary eye. The shotgun rang out with a
flash, and not even the demon's evil-fueled reflexes were fast
enough to prevent the bullet from piercing its eye, its brain, and
the back of its skull. The giant gray mass snapped back as its head
exploded in a fireworks display of gray goo. It then slumped
forward and came to its ultimate rest hanging half-out of the
crypt, its fishy sidekick dreams squashed forever on account of no
longer having a head in which to keep those dreams.
    Congressman Albiers Burnett awoke with the
shotgun's boom, screamed like a little girl, and instinctively dove
for cover. The blonde woman saw him, thought of how awful he had
always been to her, and just barfed all the heck over the back of
his designer suit. She wiped off her mouth and turned to face the
doctor. “I feel so much better now.” she told him.
    “I'm glad,” the doctor said, smiling but
retching a little at the smell.
    She threw the money-filled briefcase into the
pile of gastric juices on the Congressman's back, and yelled at
him, “I quit, you big jerk!”
    As the briefcase bounced off the Albiers'
cowering body, its locks became dislodged. It opened wide as it
spun through the air, spilling $1000 stacks of bills all over the
two piles of puke that the blonde woman had produced. Mr.
Sunglasses and the idiot saw this, and knew they had found another
thing to compete over.
    The congressman yelled,
“Noooooooooooooooooooo!” as his worst nightmare somehow got even
worse. He really did love money most of all.
    “Just like J.F.K!” A frantic voice yelled
from downstairs. The crazy lady came running into the room, her
face beaming with excitement. “His body wasn't shot from the front,
but still lurched forward, just like John F Kennedy did! You killed
Kennedy! I'm free!” She danced around the pews, trampling unseen
deviled-ham mascots underneath her best high heels. Even if the
others knew what she was talking about, it still wouldn't have made
any sense.
    The groaning outside had completely ceased.
Not only that, but the sun was now out and shining as only it can
shine. It had instantly become daytime when the fish thing's head
exploded. The doctor was the first to make his way to the door and
remove the barricades. The Irish man put a hand on his shoulder. It
was strong enough to stop him in his tracks.
    “Nyeece Sho-at, doctar,” the hooligan said,
“But are ye so shu-are it's sayaf out theyar?”
    He nodded, wordlessly brushing the hand away
and throwing open the wooden doors. All around the chapel, the dead
lay dead on the ground. The smell of rot was strong, but none of
the bodies were moving, which was a welcome change. The doctor just
kept on walking, relishing finally being outside of that stone
prison and away from those annoying people. He had to move gingerly
while climbing over some of the bigger cadaver piles, but
eventually he got past them and onto the naked forest floor. He
paused and felt