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house so he can sell it and take the money and go to Florida with his shiksa.”
    â€œHe’s a good boy,” said Leonard, trying to calm her. Her voice traveled; a couple at the next table turned their way. When Leonard had parked outside the restaurant, she’d grabbed his arm to steady herself as they walked toward the entrance. A bit tipsy already, he’d thought then. “He means well, I’m sure.”
    â€œYou think it’s a good idea we become friends? You like that idea, Leonard Mandelbaum, do you?”
    â€œMost of my friends are dead.”
    â€œYou’re an old man, Leonard.”
    â€œEighty-four.”
    â€œYou outlived them. Myra, Dick Senior. Everyone.”
    â€œI always liked Dick Senior.”
    â€œOh, Dick was a prince. A real prince.” She offered her wineglass. “To Dick Funkhouser, wherever he may be.” Leonard clinked her glass with his own, and she drank off a few ounces. “I need a real drink. Order me one.”
    When the waitress arrived with their dinner, Leonard told her, “A sidecar for the lady and a scotch on the rocks for me.”
    â€œHow did you know?” She had her head down, sawing her chicken cutlet with a serrated knife.
    â€œYou always asked for it at parties.”
    â€œIt’s been thirty years since I’ve been to a party at your house.”
    â€œPart of my job. I never forget a drink or the name of a spouse. People like to be remembered.”
    â€œWhat a salesman. You and your Cadillacs.”
    â€œStaci and Gary. Your grandkids.”
    â€œFor God’s sake, don’t you forget anything?”
    â€œSeems like all I do is forget these days, or try to.”
    â€œDon’t be maudlin.” She wore a white sweater with gold sequins, and Leonard noticed a fresh splotch of spaghetti sauce on her chest. The woman had a healthy appetite. Half the cutlet was gone already. Her plump fingers worked diligently, cutting and forking the meat into her bright red mouth. “Dick Senior was a maudlin man. He cried during television commercials. Tears streaming down his face during an Alpo ad.”
    â€œI always liked Dick Senior.”
    â€œYou said that already, Leonard. Please stop saying things twice.”
    â€œFine,” he said. “Fine.”
    â€œDick Senior got me pregnant on a cot in his dry-cleaning shop. I came in to pick up a blouse for my mother and I ended up in the back room with my skirt up. I was married at seventeen. I didn’t even finish high school. Did you know that?”
    â€œDid I know what?”
    â€œThe man was twenty years older and hung like a horse. I never knew men could be small until I found out the hard way. No pun intended.”
    Leonard glanced at the neighboring tables to see if anyone could hear her. “Keep your voice down.”
    â€œAm I embarrassing you?”
    â€œI might know someone here.”
    â€œAll your friends are dead, Leonard. You said so yourself. Who’s going to care if you’re seen cavorting with a drunken woman? Who’s left to notice?”
    â€œEat your shells,” he said.
    â€œFine. I’ll eat my shells. You talk. I’ll eat.”
    â€œI didn’t know Dick was that much older.”
    â€œYou mean you didn’t know I was so young. You mean I look older.”
    â€œNo, no. You look fine.”
    â€œI don’t look fine, Len. I’m a wreck. I’m sixty-nine years old and I can’t afford a car and my son feels he has to pimp me out to an old devil like you.”
    This made Leonard smile. He was enjoying himself, he realized, in spite of the commotion she was causing, in spite of the spectacle of her spilling gravy onto her sweater. She was a disaster, but in her presence he did feel somewhat devilish—the way she’d hung on his arm when they’dentered the restaurant, the movement of her large hips and breasts. The woman was lively conversation, you