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tambourine, a bang-and-pop toy, a toddler-size hammer and workbench. The tumult will be easier on everyone’s ears (and nerves) if your toddler drums in a carpeted room or while sitting on upholstered furniture.
    Help him find the rhythmic beat elsewhere. In music of all kinds, live and on tape, at home and in the car; in clapping and foot-stomping games; in the chirping of the cricket, the din of traffic, the tick-tock of a clock; in his own body (encourage him to dance or sway rhythmically to music or song).
    No banging in public, please. Parents of toddlers have to be somewhat tolerant (they don’t have much choice). The rest of the world doesn’t have to be, should-n’t be expected to be, and often isn’t. So if your toddler grabs your spoon and starts jamming in a restaurant, for example, stop him promptly—even if he isn’t in danger of hurting himself or his surround ings. Better still, think ahead whenever possible. Remove the silverware and the china (especially if it’s fragile) from his place setting before you sit him down at the table, and engage him in a socially acceptable activity before he has a chance to start, or even think about starting, to bang. Divert him with a game of peekaboo (use the menu or napkin), a quiet song, a picture book, or a pad and crayons you’ve cleverly thought to bring along. If necessary, takea break in the foyer or outside until the food arrives.
D IAPERING DIFFICULTIES
    “There doesn’t seem to be any way to get my son to hold still for a diaper change.”
    The battle of the bottom—parent strives to cover it, child struggles to keep it bare—is enacted countless times a day in the homes of active toddlers. Though the parents may appear the winners—after all, the bottom ultimately ends up covered—the tension of the battle leaves them feeling ravaged rather than victorious.
    For some little ones, revolting against the diaper is a short-lived phase; for others it continues to some degree until potty learning is complete. In the meantime, trying these strategies may help bring about a speedier truce: Check for wounds. Your little rebel may have a diaper rash that hurts more when the diaper is on. If so, follow his doctor’s recommendation for treating the condition (or see page 470). If the rash gets progressively worse or doesn’t disappear in a couple of days, check with the doctor.
    Choose your gear wisely. Since speed is of the essence, the fastest methods of diapering should be favored. Instead of cloth, pins, and plastic pants, use a diaper cum Velcro-closing wrap or disposables. This measure also helps eliminate the risk of accidental pin sticks, which can further complicate the diapering process.
    Have everything in readiness. Don’t wait until you’ve bared your child’s bottom to gather your wipes, ointments, corn starch, and diapers. (For safety’s sake, arrange them out of his reach.)
    Create a diversion. The diversions most likely to succeed in capturing baby’s attention during diapering are those that are not used in everyday play but are reserved for diaper changes only. But because one toddler’s distraction is another’s ho-hum, it’s usually a matter of trial and rejection until you find the amusements that work for your child. (Of course, avoid anything that might shatter if dropped off the side of the changing table.) Try a plastic hourglass; an unbreakable wind-up musical toy, a sturdy music box, a shakable music-maker, such as a tambourine; a stuffed animal suspended over the table; a tape of children’s songs; or any other appealing diversion that your toddler can manipulate, watch, or listen to during a diaper change. Or, divert with a participatory game, such as “Show me your belly . . . show me your nose . . .” (punctuated by kisses, of course), or by appointing your toddler your “diaper helper,” and have him hand you the supplies (make sure tops are tightly screwed on) as you need them.
    Move the offensive. If the changing