folks. No sleeping in the park.”
“No problem, officer.” I nodded, not breaking eye contact with Logan.
A moment later the cop turned and left, leaving us alone in the dark, silent park.
Seeing him outside the hospital was throwing me off more than I cared to admit, like he only existed within the walls of that tiny hospital room. “What are you doing out here?”
Logan rubbed a hand across the back of his neck, looking down at the ground. “They dropped the charges against me today. And then you didn’t come…”
“I’m sorry,” I interrupted. I knew from overhearing hallway conversations in the hospital, there was no case against him.
“And since they couldn’t legally hold me in the hospital anymore, I signed myself out.”
“Oh.” Oh was all I could come up with. He’d chosen to be homeless rather than stay another night in the hospital. It didn’t make any sense. “Well, do you have anywhere to go?” I reached for his forearm and he stepped back, out of my reach.
“I’ll be fine, Ashlyn. You got what you wanted for your paper. I heard Dr. Andrews say something about your thesis being nearly finished. I figured that was why you didn’t come back today. You’re free to go on with your life. Forget about me. Everyone else has,” he added under his breath.
I stepped in closer, placing my palm on his cheek. “No, Logan. You’ve got it wrong. My paper’s been done for several days. I couldn’t come tonight, but I left a message for you with the hospital staff.”
He raised his eyebrows, like he was deciding if he should believe me. “I never got a message.”
“I’m sorry, but I didn’t ditch you. Come back to my apartment for the night. We can figure things out in the morning.”
He removed my hand from his cheek, lowering it to my side. “I don’t want your pity, Ashlyn.”
“Logan, we both know there’s something between us. This isn’t pity. Please come with me. You need somewhere to sleep tonight. Let me be there for you.” Those last words seemed to soften him, because he closed his eyes for a moment, then nodded.
“Okay. If you’re sure it’s no trouble.”
I looked at the ground, my throat tight, and my stomach a bundle of nerves. “I promise it’s no trouble.”
I led Logan the few blocks to my building in silence, while the tension rolled off him in waves. I hated that he thought I’d abandoned him once I got what I needed for my paper. Couldn’t he see that it was so much more than that for me? We walked up to the third floor, which I’d grown used to and no longer left me winded. I unlocked the door, and grimaced when I remembered the state of my apartment and Liz’s warning about bringing a man home tonight. Who could have known she’d be right and that it’d be Logan? It seemed impossible, but he really was here, stepping inside my crowded one-bedroom apartment, making it look even smaller than it was with his large frame.
I flicked on the foyer light, illuminating the crazy mess that was my apartment. “Home sweet home,” I murmured, tossing my keys onto the side table.
“Wow. I can…see that.”
“And no cracks about my house keeping. Despite the mess, I know where everything is.”
He chuckled. “You don’t have people over often, do you?”
I shook my head. “Just my friend Liz. You’re the first guy I’ve had here.”
“Really?” He seemed surprised, almost unbelieving.
“Yep.” I tossed my heels in the corner on top of my mound of shoes and motioned him toward the sofa. “Have a seat. Can I get you anything? I’m going to grab myself a bottle of water.”
“Water would be nice, thanks.”
I grabbed the bottles of water from the fridge and when I returned to the living room, I found Logan standing in front of the single painting that hung on my living room wall, a rendition of Van Gogh’s “Starry Night”. His finger lightly traced the blue swirls of the sky as if he was remembering some detail. He dropped his hand
Colm Tóibín, Carmen Callil