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Chris proposed, I knew I needed to find a place to stay—both for their privacy and for my sanity—but I didn’t think I could afford the neighborhood that grew so dear to me. My first week as book review editor at Spirit Magazine , I mentioned my position to Bill and he helped me find an apartment, albeit totally out of my price range.
    â€œBill! I can’t afford this place.”
    â€œSure you can. Things might be tight—”
    â€œYou’ve seen my paycheck, Bill. Food would be a luxury if I stayed here.”
    â€œWell, you have friends. Eat at their house.”
    Problem solved. Most evenings I would eat at Norma’s house, and not once did Chris make me feel like the third wheel that I often was.
    â€œIt may be a little crowded—” Norma started.
    â€œI know Chris has turned my old bedroom into his office, but that’s okay, I’ll sleep—”
    â€œI’m pregnant.”
    I sunk back in my seat.
    Pregnant.
    I should have been congratulating her, telling her how happy I was, but I couldn’t shake off the realization that she was leaving me again—first by getting married, and now this. Norma was my plan B; I didn’t have any other options.
    â€œThat’s great,” I finally said, taking a bite out of my Caesar salad, crunching on a huge Parmesan crouton.
    â€œYou don’t sound too pleased,” Norma said.
    I knew I hurt her feelings, but I couldn’t wrap my mind around it. Everything was happening so fast. I had been so careless with my money, always thinking there was time to earn more. But now I was unemployed. And with thirty creeping up like a thief, my stomach trembled with the eggs in my ovaries that would never be fertilized. Where was my husband? Why didn’t I own my apartment that I could fill with children? I had no one to lean on, a lesson I’ve known all my life, but the full realization had hit home today. Who told Norma it was time to grow up?
    â€œNo, no, I’m really happy for you—”
    â€œYou don’t act like it.” She sighed. “I’m sorry about what happened to you, and you know if things were different we would love for you to stay with us, but the apartment will be crowded enough as it is.”
    â€œI know, I know. Don’t worry about me; I’ll be fine. Let’s talk about you. Have you picked out baby names?”
    I plastered a smile on my face and listened to my good friend talk about her future bundle of joy as my heart squeezed with the knowledge that I would have to figure this out on my own.

Assistant
    I had another interview scheduled for that afternoon with YOUTH , a hip young magazine for the eighteen-to-thirty set. It was a much different take than I was used to, but it was one of the last magazines that was hiring.
    â€œMrs. Sommers will see you now.”
    â€œSommers? You mean—”
    I took a sharp inhale of breath as I saw my former assistant, Cassidy, in the large office. She was seated behind a modern opaque glass desk, and was on the phone when I entered. We both waited by the door until she waved us in.
    She hung up, and her assistant spoke: “Mrs. Sommers, this is our last interview for today, Mariah Stevens. Will you need anything else?”
    â€œNo, Sheila, thank you. Please Mariah have a seat.”
    I couldn’t hide my shock as I lowered myself into the white leather chair.
    â€œCassidy, how did you—”
    â€œI’d prefer if you called me Mrs. Sommers.”
    â€œCassidy—”
    â€œMrs. Sommers,” Cassidy said, in a tone that let me know she wasn’t playing. “Now let’s see your résumé.”
    â€œCass—I mean, Mrs. Sommers, do you really think that’s necessary? You know I’m qualified for this position.”
    â€œI’ll be the judge of that. Your résumé, please.”
    I dug in my bag and handed it to her.
    â€œYou’ve only worked at one