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differently.
    ‘You have been
suffering this… all the time. And not been able to tell. That is
why you wanted to go to join that secluded order?’ she coloured up
then, realising she had let something slip in front of Davey.
    ‘Yes. It’s
true.’ I said, ‘they were the only other people who I could be
around and it didn’t torment me all the time.’
    ‘So why didn’t
you go?’ she asked.
    ‘Because,’ I
said, ‘I was running away, and although it gave me some peace to be
there. It gave me some faith… even though it’s been a very rocky
start, I knew that it was better to try and find an answer
elsewhere.’
    ‘The
expedition.’
    ‘Yes.’
    ‘But you ended
up in it even though you had the accident and were…’
    ‘Even though I
was dying in hospital.’ I finished for her, ‘yes, it’s true.’
    ‘So you really
were going to come on the expedition?’ asked Davey.
    ‘Yes… and No.
it was undecided. I had a meeting with the man from the order. He
happened to be in London on a conference, and he said he would meet
me and talk. And later the same day… I was to have… I mean I did
have the interview for the Sandglass experiment.’
    ‘Do you
remember it now?’ Davey asked.
    ‘You mean the
interview for Sandglass… yes. But it’s just like the déjà vu we all
got on the expedition. I remember it… but only by going back from
the moment I’m in tracing it back.’
    ‘Do did you
meet you man, you were supposed to meet?’ Asked Marcia.
    ‘I…. err…’ I
found I wasn’t sure. And her question was odd, since it presupposed
that in that version I had been on my way to meet him just before
the crash. It was early the next day. That’s why Janey and I were
going to travel down during the night. He could meet me…. When? I
cast my mind back. Davey seemed animated by something.
    ‘Did you meet
anyone on the way?’ he asked me.
    ‘No. why?’
    ‘Just a
thought.’ He looked puzzled then.
    ‘I don’t know
what happened,’ I said, ‘but like you, I do suspect foul play.
Sandglass was not the place for people like me, according to the
board.’
    ‘But you were
on the board.’ said Davey, ‘they made you resign.’
    ‘I was on the
board in another version of reality.’ I said, ‘And that way they
had a reason for me not to be in a certain place at a certain time.
That way I was no trouble; and no influence. It all hinges on that
day; late on that day. The board was the next day. I was to go. It
was later on the Second of August. I would have had… I mean; I did
have, three appointments that day. The man from the order; the
Sandglass interview; and then the board meeting as a new member. I
had been seconded from the graduate set that Hanson’s mob
controlled. It was someone else who put me forward for it. I was
informed by phone that I was on, as I had already consented to
stand if they voted for me.’
    ‘So you really
did have a say in the matter?’ Marcia stood to go in the kitchen
again. I heard her putting the kettle on. I was thinking more
slowly now. Not in such a panic, not racing thoughts like I
normally had. I head the buzzer go. Davey got up to let Janey
in.
    She was dancing
in the door, upbeat and chatty. She threw herself at Davey.
    ‘Oh Darling!
You look so much better. How is my errant brother? Not giving you
too much trouble I hope.’
    ‘I don’t know
what to tell you,’ said Davey cheerfully, ‘he’s about the same as
usual. Totally unpredictable…. but there is something; but then how
about you? What did our respective Mothers have to say for
themselves?’
    ‘Oh! That is a
bit of a mystery. Jules is still there. He and Peter took some of
our more… experimental instruments. We found a residue trace as if
something has recently been there but had disappeared. It was
really odd…. Anyway, George has got the details. Let’s not be
boring, he can fill us all in tomorrow.’
    ‘Tomorrow?’ I
said as I leaned against the door jamb that led from the