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place they met in order to re-create the magic.

    There’s also the possibility of Spontaneous Agreement. This occurs mostly among couples who have been together a long time; maybe one day they’re doing the dishes and it becomes simultaneously obvious that this is The One. Charlotte turns to Miranda and says, “Why don’t we get married?” Miranda says, “I can’t think of any reason not to. Is it my turn to wash or dry?” We find this occurrence kind of charming, but also suggest that if you find yourselves in such a situation, you might want to mark the occasion in a romantic way. Cook a special meal, unplug all media, and spend the evening in. Go shopping together for engagement rings if you’re going to wear them, or buy a commemorative object for your household that you’ve both been wanting. (How about that antique bed you’ve been eyeing, or a set of new sheets?) Steal away for the weekend. Go to a ballgame and arrange to have
Congratulations
flashed on the scoreboard. Just do whatever it is you most enjoy doing together.
    It’s also possible that when the question is finally posed, your loved one will say, “What, are you crazy?” or “Come back next year and ask me again.” If this happens, don’t despair, and don’t give up! Fran told us that she tried to get Sandyto marry her for three years before Sandy finally agreed to say, “I do.” That was seven years ago, and they’re still happily married.
    At any rate, we’re going to proceed with the assumption that however you’ve gotten there, the answer at this point is “Yes.”
Always Ring Twice?
    Judy, sweetheart, you’re engaged? Congratulations! Best wishes! Oh, I know you’ll be so happy together. I remember when your uncle and I got engaged. I felt so hopeful, so fresh. So she’s a nice girl? Let’s see the engagement ring! What?!? No ring? She didn’t buy you a ring? You young lesbians are so modern.…
    Heaven knows you don’t need an engagement ring to enter into the (Not the) Engagement. Traditionally, in the straight world, a man proposes with engagement ring in hand, and when his beloved accepts, he immediately slips the ring onto her finger. However, an engagement ring doesn’t say “I owe you one wedding ring”; rather, it is symbolic of your intentions. If you’ve always wanted that rock on the fourth finger of your left hand, and you’re both willing to spring for it, here’s your chance. It’s not uncommon to see two lesbians wearing matching diamond rings these days; in fact, engagement rings are becoming popular with gay men as well. It really doesn’t matter what kind of a ring you wear, unless it’s important to you that the general public is aware of your engagement.
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    DO YOUR DIAMOND HOMEWORK
    Thanks to Leonardo DiCaprio’s movie
Blood Diamond,
more attention is now paid to the origin of diamonds, which in the 1990s were being used to finance wars in places like Sierra Leone and Angola. In 2002, the UN adopted a system called the Kimberley Process Certification Scheme to end the practice of diamond trading for dubious means. Diamonds that have been mined and shipped in a humane, legitimate way have a Kimberley Process certificate, which your jeweler should be able to provide. Buying from a well-established, reputable jeweler also helps, or you can shop at a retailer like Brilliant Earth, which specializes in conflict-free jewelry.
    One more thing: there are many different factors that can make the bling more expensive, but being certified conflict-free is not one of them.
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    If neither one of you plans on wearing an engagement ring but you’re sentimental, you could get a beautiful ring box from a jeweler and put one or more of the following items inside: a pipe-cleaner ring; a little slip of paper with the words, “Will you marry me?”; or a tiny print of your