The Art of Manliness: Classic Skills and Manners for the Modern Man
and lack permanence: Kissing your female boss’s hand will earn you the stink eye, not her favor. But much of what constitutes good manners is based on the sound and unchanging principles of consideration and respect. A gentleman is polite not because he is afraid of a scolding from Miss Manners, but rather because he is sensitive to the feelings and needs of others. He treats those around him with respect, and in so doing, encourages them to act likewise. And cultivating good manners is not a solely altruistic endeavor either; being a man a lady can take home to Mom and an employee a boss need not worry about causing embarrassment at an important lunch is a significant bonus.
    How to Be the Perfect Party Guest
    Throwing a party is a stressful endeavor. A host must worry about the food, the entertainment and whether their guests are getting along, having a good time and behaving themselves. Take one worry off the host’s list by being a winning and polite guest. Not only will you help your friend’s event be a success, you’ll find more invitations to parties in your mailbox.
    Always, always, RSVP. “RSVP” stands for “Répondez s’il vous plait,” French for “please respond.” When you receive an invitation that asks you to RSVP, the host or hostess is kindly requesting that you let them know whether or not you will be attending their function. Today’s guests have come to see the RVSP as optional. Some men believe you need to call only if you are coming; some think you need to call only if you are not coming; and some do not think you have to call either way. Sometimes RSVPing is avoided because you don’t want to face the awkwardness of telling someone you are not coming and making up an excuse about why.
    However, not RSVPing is rather rude. The reason you must RSVP is that the host or hostess needs to know how to plan his or her party. They must pick the proper venue to accommodate a certain number of guests, the proper amount of party supplies, and perhaps most importantly, the right amount of food and beverages to serve the guests. By not RSVPing you keep your host completely in the dark as they attempt to prepare for their function. The host is forced to either overspend on supplies or be under-prepared for their event.
    On that note, do not RSVP and then pull a no-show. Again, the host will have allotted for too much food and party favors, and these things will go to waste.
    If you are attending a dinner party, offer to bring something. Cooking up a tasty meal for several guests is no easy task. Take some of the pressure off by offering to bring the salad or dessert.
    Always arrive on time. If you’re twenty minutes late, you will significantly add to the cook’s stress by having them worry not only about the taste but whether the food is getting cold. If the food is not ready by the time you arrive, you simply have more time to mingle.
    If the party is a large “come and go as you please” type of shindig, being “fashionably late” is acceptable.
    Bring the phone number with you on the way over. If you get lost or have an emergency, you will need to call the host to keep them abreast. Don’t keep the party waiting without any word from you.
    Bring a gift for the host. A bottle of wine or a bouquet of flowers are excellent choices. This is particularly appropriate for dinner parties.
    Come prepared for conversation. Don’t be a party dud. On the way over, think of a few things you can talk about—movies you’ve seen, funny stories from work, and interesting news about yourself and your mutual friends. Think about the host and the other guests; what are they interested in and what kinds of questions can you ask them? Remember, you should almost always avoid controversial subjects such as politics and religion.
    Eat and drink responsibly. Don’t come to the party savage as a meat axe, ready to devour anything and everything in sight. At a party in which hors d’oeuvres are being passed

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