speak from my heart, I
would be remiss as a General of the United States
Army if I did not. Mr. President, if on the day you
took office we had, with your permission, lined up
and shot every single Vietnamese we could find, by
so doing we would have saved fifteen thousand
American lives. Instead, sir, following the course of
action that you have ordered as Commander-in-
Chief, and shooting and blowing them up
piecemeal, catch as catch can, ten here, twenty
there, and so on, we have suffered severe losses of
both men and materials.
Admittedly, by doggedly pursuing your strategy,
we are now beginning to see some light at the end
of the tunnel. And I have every hope that we will
be able to help you make good on
TRICKY HAS ANOTHER CRISIS 45
your promise to the American people, that by
Election Day 1972, and according to your own
secret timetable, you will have accomplished the
complete withdrawal of the Vietnamese people
from Vietnam.
My point, sir, is that we have ways of accomplishing
such withdrawals in a matter of hours. I beg
of you, Mr. President, let us not repeat the errors of
Vietnam in our own backyard.
LEGAL COACH: Of course, Mr. President, I can
not fault the General on his tactical wisdom, and
believe me, I am not for a moment worried about
taking on these civil-rights nuts. It's just that if we
shoot these Scouts in the street before we round
'em up and jail 'em, it is, as I said, going to create an
awful lot of unnecessary busywork for my staff,
many of them first-rate young men whom I can
employ at far more useful and worthwhile tasks.
However, before or after, Mr. President,
whichever you choose, you can count on my
support. But for you to go on TV and make a
confession, or an apology, or any kind of explanation
for yourself whatsoever, well, to my mind,
nothing could more seriously undermine your moral
and political authority, or constitute a graver threat
to the cause of law and order. I will even go so far
as to say that if you appear in any way to give
ground on this issue-or any issue for that matter-you
will be opening the
46 OUR GANG
floodgates to anarchy, socialism, communism,
welfarism, defeatism, pacifism, perversion, pornography,
prostitution, mob rule, drug addiction,
free love, alcoholism, and desecration of the flag.
You'll see a rise just in jaywalking that will stagger
the imagination. Now I don't mean to throw a
scare into anyone, but the fact is a vast criminal
element in this country is waiting for just a single
sign of weakness in our leader, so as to make its
move. Anything at all that might suggest to them
that Trick E. Dixon is not totally in control, of
himself and the nation, and I hate to tell you what
would follow. TRICKY (interrupting) : That's exactly
why I'm having my sweat glands removed, to
show how in control I am.
LEGAL COACH (continuing) : Now, as you
know, there is bound to be a certain amount of
blood shed, when we go ahead and kill these
young people, whether we do it before or after.
This blood is something we seem always to run
into with the killings, one of those facts of death
we have to live with. Reverend, I see you shaking
your head. Are you suggesting that it is possible
to kill people, even youngsters like this, without
spilling blood? If so, I'd like to hear about it.
SPIRITUAL COACH (anguished) : Well .. what
about gas .. poison gas ... Something like that?
Surely enough blood has been shed in our century.
MILITARY COACH: The only trouble with gas,
Reverend, if I may speak here on the basis of my
own firsthand experience-the trouble with gas is
that unfortunately we don't have these Scouts in a
big open space. If we had them, say, smack in the
middle of a desert somewhere, sure, spray 'em and
it's over with.
SPIRITUAL COACH: Couldn't we get them to a
desert then?
LEGAL COACH: How? (Wary) Are you suggesting
bussing them there?
SPIRITUAL COACH: Well, yes, busses would do
it, I
would be remiss as a General of the United States
Army if I did not. Mr. President, if on the day you
took office we had, with your permission, lined up
and shot every single Vietnamese we could find, by
so doing we would have saved fifteen thousand
American lives. Instead, sir, following the course of
action that you have ordered as Commander-in-
Chief, and shooting and blowing them up
piecemeal, catch as catch can, ten here, twenty
there, and so on, we have suffered severe losses of
both men and materials.
Admittedly, by doggedly pursuing your strategy,
we are now beginning to see some light at the end
of the tunnel. And I have every hope that we will
be able to help you make good on
TRICKY HAS ANOTHER CRISIS 45
your promise to the American people, that by
Election Day 1972, and according to your own
secret timetable, you will have accomplished the
complete withdrawal of the Vietnamese people
from Vietnam.
My point, sir, is that we have ways of accomplishing
such withdrawals in a matter of hours. I beg
of you, Mr. President, let us not repeat the errors of
Vietnam in our own backyard.
LEGAL COACH: Of course, Mr. President, I can
not fault the General on his tactical wisdom, and
believe me, I am not for a moment worried about
taking on these civil-rights nuts. It's just that if we
shoot these Scouts in the street before we round
'em up and jail 'em, it is, as I said, going to create an
awful lot of unnecessary busywork for my staff,
many of them first-rate young men whom I can
employ at far more useful and worthwhile tasks.
However, before or after, Mr. President,
whichever you choose, you can count on my
support. But for you to go on TV and make a
confession, or an apology, or any kind of explanation
for yourself whatsoever, well, to my mind,
nothing could more seriously undermine your moral
and political authority, or constitute a graver threat
to the cause of law and order. I will even go so far
as to say that if you appear in any way to give
ground on this issue-or any issue for that matter-you
will be opening the
46 OUR GANG
floodgates to anarchy, socialism, communism,
welfarism, defeatism, pacifism, perversion, pornography,
prostitution, mob rule, drug addiction,
free love, alcoholism, and desecration of the flag.
You'll see a rise just in jaywalking that will stagger
the imagination. Now I don't mean to throw a
scare into anyone, but the fact is a vast criminal
element in this country is waiting for just a single
sign of weakness in our leader, so as to make its
move. Anything at all that might suggest to them
that Trick E. Dixon is not totally in control, of
himself and the nation, and I hate to tell you what
would follow. TRICKY (interrupting) : That's exactly
why I'm having my sweat glands removed, to
show how in control I am.
LEGAL COACH (continuing) : Now, as you
know, there is bound to be a certain amount of
blood shed, when we go ahead and kill these
young people, whether we do it before or after.
This blood is something we seem always to run
into with the killings, one of those facts of death
we have to live with. Reverend, I see you shaking
your head. Are you suggesting that it is possible
to kill people, even youngsters like this, without
spilling blood? If so, I'd like to hear about it.
SPIRITUAL COACH (anguished) : Well .. what
about gas .. poison gas ... Something like that?
Surely enough blood has been shed in our century.
MILITARY COACH: The only trouble with gas,
Reverend, if I may speak here on the basis of my
own firsthand experience-the trouble with gas is
that unfortunately we don't have these Scouts in a
big open space. If we had them, say, smack in the
middle of a desert somewhere, sure, spray 'em and
it's over with.
SPIRITUAL COACH: Couldn't we get them to a
desert then?
LEGAL COACH: How? (Wary) Are you suggesting
bussing them there?
SPIRITUAL COACH: Well, yes, busses would do
it, I
Similar Books
Whatever the Cost
Lynn Kelling
Serious Men
Manu Joseph
WalkingSin
Lynn LaFleur
Worth the Weight
Mara Jacobs
Nobody's Hero
Liz Lee
Styxx (DH #33)
Sherrilyn Kenyon
Mate of the Alpha
Marie Mason
Mate of Her Heart
R. E. Butler