Read Never Be Lied to Again for Free Online Page B
Authors: David J. Lieberman
want anyone not to vote for John Kennedy because he is a Catholic."
The intent was obviously different from the message, but he got his point across nicely.
Although as history later proved, his effort was futile.
Whenever someone makes a point of telling you what they're not doing, you can be sure it's exactly what they are doing. The preamble is what they really mean. After a blind date, Jim was informed by the woman he went out with that she's very busy for the next few weeks but that she doesn't want him to think she's blowing him off. If that was not her intention, then it wouldn't have occurred to her to say that.
When you hear, "Not to hurt your feelings, but. . ."
you can be sure that this person doesn't mind hurting your feelings.
Another clever way of lying through implying comes in the form of a denial. It works like this.
Let's say that an agent is attempting to convince a casting director to cast his client, John Jones, instead of another actor, Sam Smith. The agent casually mentions to the casting director that Sam was at the Betty Ford Clinic last month, but heard it was only to see a friend. Now the casting director wonders if Sam has an alcohol or drug problem. Had the agent simply said that Sam was there to get treatment, the casting director would have been suspicious of his intentions in mentioning it. By stating it in the form of a denial, he implants the suggestion without suspicion.
Let's look at another example. You hear, "He's having marital problems, but it has nothing to do with his wife's new job." What's the first thing you ask? "What does his wife do?" Suddenly you're in the exact conversation that is "supposed" to have no bearing on the facts. Clever, isn't it? Don't be misled.
C L U E 38
Don't Be Ridiculous
Beware of the person who uses humour and sarcasm to defuse your concerns. For instance, you ask one of your salespeople if she met with the competition and she replies, "Sure did. We meet every day in a secret warehouse. You can get in only if you know the special knock. It's there where we discuss the eventual downfall of your business empire." This makes you feel foolish about inquiring further. And she knows it. When you ask a serious question, you should expect a direct response.
C L U E 39
We're Out of Stock
Have you ever had the salesman tell you that the item you were looking for is inferior to another one? And as it turns out, the one that you want happens to be out of stock.
Clearly, he would have been much more believable if he had said he did have what you wanted but preferred to show you something even better. So before you accept someone at his word that he has something better to offer, first see whether he has what you originally asked for. If he doesn't, there's a better than even chance that you shouldn't believe him.
C L U E 40
The Number Zone
There's an old saying that goes, "If you always tell the truth, then you'll never have to remember anything."
When a liar speaks, in an attempt to appear fluid, he will often fall into the number zone. This is when all of the numbers he mentions are the same or multiples of one another. This happens because he is thinking fast and is trying to remember what he's saying. A typical exchange during a job interview might go as follows:
Ms. SMITH: SO, Mark, how many years' experience do you
have in restaurant management?
MARK: At the three places I've worked, I've had about six years experience in total.
Ms. SMITH: Tell me a little bit about your experience at these
places.
MARK: Well, I would put in sixty-hour weeks. And I was in
charge of a crew of about twelve . . .
Watch out when facts, figures, and information have unusual similarities.
C L U E 41
Nervous Nellie
While we can control some gestures, the following are involuntary responses that we have little or no control over:
The fight-or-flight syndrome: A person's face may become flushed or, with extreme fear, can turn white. Look for signs of rapid
The intent was obviously different from the message, but he got his point across nicely.
Although as history later proved, his effort was futile.
Whenever someone makes a point of telling you what they're not doing, you can be sure it's exactly what they are doing. The preamble is what they really mean. After a blind date, Jim was informed by the woman he went out with that she's very busy for the next few weeks but that she doesn't want him to think she's blowing him off. If that was not her intention, then it wouldn't have occurred to her to say that.
When you hear, "Not to hurt your feelings, but. . ."
you can be sure that this person doesn't mind hurting your feelings.
Another clever way of lying through implying comes in the form of a denial. It works like this.
Let's say that an agent is attempting to convince a casting director to cast his client, John Jones, instead of another actor, Sam Smith. The agent casually mentions to the casting director that Sam was at the Betty Ford Clinic last month, but heard it was only to see a friend. Now the casting director wonders if Sam has an alcohol or drug problem. Had the agent simply said that Sam was there to get treatment, the casting director would have been suspicious of his intentions in mentioning it. By stating it in the form of a denial, he implants the suggestion without suspicion.
Let's look at another example. You hear, "He's having marital problems, but it has nothing to do with his wife's new job." What's the first thing you ask? "What does his wife do?" Suddenly you're in the exact conversation that is "supposed" to have no bearing on the facts. Clever, isn't it? Don't be misled.
C L U E 38
Don't Be Ridiculous
Beware of the person who uses humour and sarcasm to defuse your concerns. For instance, you ask one of your salespeople if she met with the competition and she replies, "Sure did. We meet every day in a secret warehouse. You can get in only if you know the special knock. It's there where we discuss the eventual downfall of your business empire." This makes you feel foolish about inquiring further. And she knows it. When you ask a serious question, you should expect a direct response.
C L U E 39
We're Out of Stock
Have you ever had the salesman tell you that the item you were looking for is inferior to another one? And as it turns out, the one that you want happens to be out of stock.
Clearly, he would have been much more believable if he had said he did have what you wanted but preferred to show you something even better. So before you accept someone at his word that he has something better to offer, first see whether he has what you originally asked for. If he doesn't, there's a better than even chance that you shouldn't believe him.
C L U E 40
The Number Zone
There's an old saying that goes, "If you always tell the truth, then you'll never have to remember anything."
When a liar speaks, in an attempt to appear fluid, he will often fall into the number zone. This is when all of the numbers he mentions are the same or multiples of one another. This happens because he is thinking fast and is trying to remember what he's saying. A typical exchange during a job interview might go as follows:
Ms. SMITH: SO, Mark, how many years' experience do you
have in restaurant management?
MARK: At the three places I've worked, I've had about six years experience in total.
Ms. SMITH: Tell me a little bit about your experience at these
places.
MARK: Well, I would put in sixty-hour weeks. And I was in
charge of a crew of about twelve . . .
Watch out when facts, figures, and information have unusual similarities.
C L U E 41
Nervous Nellie
While we can control some gestures, the following are involuntary responses that we have little or no control over:
The fight-or-flight syndrome: A person's face may become flushed or, with extreme fear, can turn white. Look for signs of rapid
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