Read Never Be Lied to Again for Free Online
Authors: David J. Lieberman
internal or external. When a person is confident about what he's saying, he's more interested in your understanding him and less interested in how he appears to you.
• The point of view of a third party is likely to be absent from a liar's story.
• In relating a story, a liar often leaves out the negative aspects.
• A liar willingly answers your questions but asks none of his own.
S E C T I O N 7
G E N E R A L I N D I C A T I O N S OF D E C E I T
The following is a mixed bag of clues that indicate deception. They can be used with great reliability by themselves or in conjunction with other clues.
C L U E 31
Whew, I'm Sure Glad That's Over
Watch and listen carefully during a conversation when the subject is changed. Does he become happier? Does he seem more relaxed? He may even offer a smile or nervous laugh. Notice his posture.
Does it become more relaxed and less defensive? The giveaway here is how fast and dramatically his mood changes, indicating his discomfort with the previous subject matter. Test him to see if he's quick to change the subject. If he has been accused of something abominable and is innocent, he will resent the accusations and will insist that the topic be explored further, either now or at some future date.
Remember, the guilty wants the subject changed; the innocent always wants a further exchange of information.
C L U E 32
How Dare You Accuse Me?
If he is accused of something harsh and is not indignant and offended that his honour has been questioned, this is a highly reliable sign that he's been caught off guard. It's been said that during the preliminary stages of the 0. J. Simpson investigation, detectives thought it curious that Simpson did not appear to be outraged by the accusation that he had murdered his ex-wife and her friend Ron Goldman.
While he is being accused the liar will remain fairly expressionless, like a student being admonished by his principal. A look as if to say "What?!" will not be present. The liar is more concerned with how he is going to respond than he is with the accusation itself.
C L U E 33
Never Believe Anyone Who Says This
Have you ever met someone who insisted on starting statements with phrases such as "To be perfectly honest," "To be frank," or "To tell you the truth"?
Someone who is telling the truth doesn't need to convince you before he gets his words out. Some people habitually use these phrases. Such expressions mean literally that everything that came before them is a lie, everything that will come after will be a lie, but for now he's decided to pause to tell you the truth. If these phrases are not part of a person's usual verbal repertoire, watch out! If someone's going to tell you the truth, it's unlikely that he would start off by saying just that. If he feels the need to tell you that he's being honest and that you're about to receive the whole truth, you can be pretty sure you're not getting it.
Also included in this clue is the ever-pervasive and always annoying phrase "Why would I lie to you?" If you receive this response to an accusation you've made, be suspicious. If he's being accused of something, he probably has an excellent reason to lie.
I cannot tell a lie. Or can I? The phrase "I never lie" should always be received with caution. Anyone who needs to declare his virtuous nature does so because there is no other way for you to find out.
Some people will say just about anything to sound believable, even lie straight to your face. One's honour should speak for itself. When a person tells you that he is the most honest person that you will ever meet, don't walk away—run.
C L U E 34
I've Got My Answer Down Pat
If his answer sounds pat and well rehearsed, there's a fair chance that he was expecting the question and took the time to get his story straight. Having facts and details at your fingertips that should not be easily recalled is a good indication that you have prepared.
For instance, suppose Samantha, when asked
• The point of view of a third party is likely to be absent from a liar's story.
• In relating a story, a liar often leaves out the negative aspects.
• A liar willingly answers your questions but asks none of his own.
S E C T I O N 7
G E N E R A L I N D I C A T I O N S OF D E C E I T
The following is a mixed bag of clues that indicate deception. They can be used with great reliability by themselves or in conjunction with other clues.
C L U E 31
Whew, I'm Sure Glad That's Over
Watch and listen carefully during a conversation when the subject is changed. Does he become happier? Does he seem more relaxed? He may even offer a smile or nervous laugh. Notice his posture.
Does it become more relaxed and less defensive? The giveaway here is how fast and dramatically his mood changes, indicating his discomfort with the previous subject matter. Test him to see if he's quick to change the subject. If he has been accused of something abominable and is innocent, he will resent the accusations and will insist that the topic be explored further, either now or at some future date.
Remember, the guilty wants the subject changed; the innocent always wants a further exchange of information.
C L U E 32
How Dare You Accuse Me?
If he is accused of something harsh and is not indignant and offended that his honour has been questioned, this is a highly reliable sign that he's been caught off guard. It's been said that during the preliminary stages of the 0. J. Simpson investigation, detectives thought it curious that Simpson did not appear to be outraged by the accusation that he had murdered his ex-wife and her friend Ron Goldman.
While he is being accused the liar will remain fairly expressionless, like a student being admonished by his principal. A look as if to say "What?!" will not be present. The liar is more concerned with how he is going to respond than he is with the accusation itself.
C L U E 33
Never Believe Anyone Who Says This
Have you ever met someone who insisted on starting statements with phrases such as "To be perfectly honest," "To be frank," or "To tell you the truth"?
Someone who is telling the truth doesn't need to convince you before he gets his words out. Some people habitually use these phrases. Such expressions mean literally that everything that came before them is a lie, everything that will come after will be a lie, but for now he's decided to pause to tell you the truth. If these phrases are not part of a person's usual verbal repertoire, watch out! If someone's going to tell you the truth, it's unlikely that he would start off by saying just that. If he feels the need to tell you that he's being honest and that you're about to receive the whole truth, you can be pretty sure you're not getting it.
Also included in this clue is the ever-pervasive and always annoying phrase "Why would I lie to you?" If you receive this response to an accusation you've made, be suspicious. If he's being accused of something, he probably has an excellent reason to lie.
I cannot tell a lie. Or can I? The phrase "I never lie" should always be received with caution. Anyone who needs to declare his virtuous nature does so because there is no other way for you to find out.
Some people will say just about anything to sound believable, even lie straight to your face. One's honour should speak for itself. When a person tells you that he is the most honest person that you will ever meet, don't walk away—run.
C L U E 34
I've Got My Answer Down Pat
If his answer sounds pat and well rehearsed, there's a fair chance that he was expecting the question and took the time to get his story straight. Having facts and details at your fingertips that should not be easily recalled is a good indication that you have prepared.
For instance, suppose Samantha, when asked
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