Read Katie Opens Her Heart for Free Online

again there had seemed no turning back, even when she knew her heart wasn’t responding to Ezra’s advances. On the outside she said the right things. In her cynical moments she figured his acceptance of her came because they were both older and he felt he was running out of options. At other times she wondered if this man really thought she would come around. She decided he must have great faith to marry her with the risk that she wouldn’t ever love him in return.
    Ezra had been reading The Budget on that winter evening after their wedding. The snow was blowing outside. She’d made him popcorn because that was what a gut frau did. All evening she’d been trying not to remember Daniel’s face seated in the men’s section that Sunday morning at the church service. Though Daniel now lived in another district, he’d decided to visit on the spur of the moment. Emma had gasped when she noticed him in the room. Immediately the thought came to her: What if Daniel wants to see me again? What if that was the real reason for his visit?
    It was an awful thought. One forbidden by a holy Hah and by decent and righteous people. But there it was, coming into her mind so quickly and uncontrollably. At church she might have succeeded in paying the thought no mind, but while she was making popcorn for Ezra that night it had been unleashed in full fury.
    She wanted so to love Ezra. He was worthy of even more love than a common, average girl like her could give. But she couldn’t get her heart to squeeze out even a little positive emotion. Every time she tried, her love for Daniel was there, staking first claim. Ezra had to have noticed her distress in the days that followed that evening because he said so many nice things to her that weren’t necessary.
    “We were meant for each other,” he said, coming up to slip a hand around her waist while she washed the dishes.
    “You’re all I ever dreamed of in a frau ,” he said one night after supper.
    She’d nearly broken down in tears and told him everything. Thankfully he was satisfied with a kiss, and he had apparently taken her blushing face as proof of her growing love for him.
    He was a simple man, Ezra was. Just the kind of husband she needed. And this only made things worse. She knew she was dooming any love that might rise in her heart for him. Someday Ezra would find out the truth, she feared, and his heart would seal up against her forever.
    Strangely, assistance had come from an unexpected quarter. It was as if Da Hah had mercy at the last minute when she thought she could no longer stand the pain. The green leaves had been sprouting on the trees and the first cheerful robin was hopping in the yard when help arrived. She’d been looking out of the living room window, watching Ezra work in the field, when knowledge stirred within her. She was with child—with Ezra’s child.
    For the first time, the love that was theirs alone entered her heart. She’d laughed out loud at the joy of it, and with it came the realization that she now had with Ezra what she’d never had with Daniel. Da Hah had visited them with a great blessing.
    Daniel had always been a dream, a vision she’d looked upon from afar but never touched. Ezra, on the other hand, was real. She could love such a man exactly because he wasn’t Daniel. Emma had run out of the house that day with her white apron flapping over her shoulder. She’d startled the horses, so Ezra had to hang on tight to the reins before he could bring them to a stop. When he’d stared at her with a puzzled look, she had grabbed him around the neck to kiss his cheek. He turned red and looked across the fields toward the neighbor’s house to make sure no one was watching.
    “What is it?” he had finally asked, at a loss for more to say.
    “I think I’m with child!” Emma had said.
    Ezra had smiled, his cheeks turning even redder. “That’s gut ! That’s how it should be.”
    “ Yah , I know.” She’d ducked her head and then