angry ones gone.
âDavid, I donât want to stop you from seeing your dad. You will, for certain. But leave it a while. Thatâs all Iâm asking. Can you do that much for me?â
âWhy canât I see him today?â
âBecauseâ â long dramatic sigh â âin case youâve forgotten, last night he â â
âOkay! I know what happened. And Iâm over it.â
âBut Iâm not. Wait a few days and then weâll talk about it. Can we agree on that?â
âWhat happens in a few days? Do I get to see him then?â
âIâll think about it.â
âYeah, right. I know what that means. You canât brush me off like that. I want to see him.â
Mum looks away and folds her arms, shutting me out. She has brown hair the colour of chocolate. Itâs short and straight and drifts down to just above her forehead. Dad used to massage her head at night and sheâd go to sleep on the lounge in front of the TV. Long after Allie and I went to bed Dad would sit with Mum, the TV off, the light off. Heâd rub her head for hours. There were so many little things like that. The easy smiles, holding hands, notes they left for each other, always ending with a line of kisses. I donât understand how they could go from that to this. The more I think about it, the more questions I find.
âMum?â
âYes?â
âWhat started all the fighting between you two?â
âThatâs a big subject. I donât think Iâve got time to go into the whole thing now, David.â
âI donât want every detail. Just give me a clue.â
âWell, there were a lot of reasons. Basically, your father became jealous â about my career. It all sprang from there.â
âBut, Mum, he encouraged you all the time. He wanted you to make it. He was proud of you, I know that for sure.â
âIâll always be grateful for how much your dad helped me. But then I was promoted. It happened at the sametime as his business was failing. Iâd come home full of stories about how wonderful my job was, and I didnât stop to think that it was hurting him. He became bitter. It just ate him alive.â
âCanât you talk about that stuff with him, Mum? Work it out?â
âPerhaps. Perhaps. In time.â
Mum lingers on those words. Thereâs a sadness in the way she says them that Iâve rarely heard from her. Mostly sheâs Wonder Woman. Not now. I think of TV footage of people raking through the ashes of burnt-out buildings. Thatâs what she reminds me of. Only when she checks her watch do I know sheâs back with me.
âI suppose we better get going,â she says.
âHave we got a few more minutes, Mum?â
âIf you like. Is there something you wanted to talk about?â
âI just want to get it clear in my head. About what happened between you two.â
âI think I just told you.â
âYeah, I know. But there was nothing else?â
âNot really.â
âI mean ⦠can I ask you something?â
âYes.â
âYou didnât have another guy or anything like that?â
âIs that what your father told you?â
âNooo. He doesnât talk to me about stuff like that. Dadnever says anything bad about you. Itâs only me asking.â
âI see.â
âItâs something Iâve thought about. Iâd be a gutless wonder if I didnât ask â just so I know once and for all.â
âNo, of course there was no one else.â She says it quickly, then stares back at me, unblinking.
âFair enough, Mum. Thatâs what I thought. I just had to hear it from you. You donât mind me asking, do you?â
âNo, I understand. Is there anything else you want to know?â
âOnly one last thing. You said you didnât love Dad. You didnât really mean that, did