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idea it would be our last moment together. They were supposed to be home waiting for me when I got home from work.
    It was two days after Christmas and three hours into my shift at my client’s home, when my cell phone rang with an unknown number. That phone call would change my life; the phone call from the State Trooper that opened the door to the hell I have been living.
    The State Trooper asked if I was Mason’s wife and Braxton’s mother then proceeded to explain that my presence was needed at the hospital. They sent a patrol car to retrieve and escort me to the hospital. I was dumbfounded. I didn’t know what to do. So, I called my agency and told them to send another nurse because I had a family emergency.
    When the patrol car picked me up, the Trooper had sad eyes. I knew it was something bad. He just said, “There has been an accident and we need to get you to the hospital as soon as possible.” The fifteen-minute ride felt like hours.
    They led me to a room where my husband’s aunt and uncle were waiting for me. I’m not sure why they were called and were there before I was.
    I sat between them and they each held one of my hands as the State Trooper proceeded to explain the accident to me. I had no idea what was happening. I felt numb. I had what could be explained as an out of body experience.
    There honestly is no other way to describe how I felt. Shock? Definitely.
    The medical examiner then took me to the viewing station to identify the bodies of my son and my husband.
    Oh my God, I had to stop thinking!
    I switched playlists and cranked up the music. I had to stop thinking of the past and focus on the road. I wanted to lose track of time and not get lost in my own head. I had been driving for a while now and, at some point, had entered the town of Waterville, Maine.
    I needed stop to relieve myself; the intervals between towns was farther and farther now that I was in Maine. If I didn’t stop soon, my bladder felt as though it would explode.
    I should have thought of some adult diapers or a catheter; it would have come in handy for this little road trip. Then, I wouldn’t have to stop. I still needed gas, caffeine, and smokes though, so I pulled into the next truck stop. I couldn’t believe I’d smoked half a pack of cigarettes already.
    I got out my car and stretched at the pump; my back creaked and crackled as I twisted. I headed inside to prepay for my fuel and immediately found the facilities. The bathrooms were far from clean. They smelled awful. This was definitely going to be a hovering expedition because I was afraid of any body part touching any surface in this place without contracting some communicable disease.
    It almost felt pointless to wash my hands in the sink. When I left the bathroom, I spotted the coffee station…and a clean sink. It was well equipped with lots of little International flavored creamers.
    Jackpot!
    I also spotted two truckers mixing their caffeinated treats, and a knot formed in my stomach. Only part I hated about these fuel stops was seeing all the truckers. It made me think of the drunken murderer that had stolen my loves from me. I knew, consciously, that not all truckers were drunks or murderers, but I couldn’t help that knot from forming nonetheless.
    Picking up fresh coffee, a new pack of smokes, and a salty pretzel in hand, I was ready to fuel up the tank and finish of the rest of this drive.
    I took a leg off my pretzel and shoved a good portion in my mouth. Grabbing my phone, I quickly texted Tonya to let her know my whereabouts and that I only had a few hours to go. She would never let me get too far off the grid and run away. Hell, I couldn’t even sleep in on a day off without one of them bugging out. I knew they loved me though and were prone to worry, but I was the same way with them.
    I knew she was at work, so I made it quick, so she wouldn’t get in trouble. Her manager in her little medical billing office was a dick. She billed chiropractors