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trembled. He could tell that she was trying to be strong and hold back the tears.
    â€œNo, no.” He shook his head. Since they had been together he hadn’t even entertained the idea of seeing anyone else. Bria was “it” for him.
    â€œI thought you loved me.” Her eyes begged for the explanation he desperately wanted to give her but couldn’t.
    â€œI do love you, more than anything else in this world,” he said sincerely. His heart raced as he hugged her.
    Her tears wet the left side of his cheek as her face pressed against his. “What’s wrong?” she asked barely above a whisper.
    â€œI know you deserve some answers, but I can’t deal with this right now.” He had too much going on at one time, and he felt himself getting angry. Not at her, just the situation. He needed time to sort through this thing. “It’s over. Trust me, it’s for the best.” He looked her in the eyes. “I’m not doing this to hurt you. I’m doing this because I love you.” He stood up, ready to leave.
    He wanted to tell her the truth about his disease, but he didn’t want to put that burden on her. One thing he knew about Bria was that she was loyal to a fault. When she committed herself to something, she went all in. He knew that she’d stay with him no matter what, but his heart wouldn’t let him put her through that. She was young with so much to look forward to. She shouldn’t have to worry about a terminally ill boyfriend.He didn’t want her pity. What if he had to do chemotherapy? He wasn’t about to let her see him all weak and busted like that. No way! He’d rather her not see him at all.
    And so it was.

Five
    Bria looked into Spade’s eyes, hoping that the expression “the eyes are the windows to the soul” was true, because she needed answers. Spade’s dazzling brown eyes that usually sparkled and made her fall in love with him time and time again seemed devoid of any happiness. In addition to the painful sadness they revealed, they were horribly bloodshot. She could see that he was upset. She wondered what could’ve happened.
    She searched her mind trying to find a hint as to what could’ve caused Spade to behave this way, and she came up with nothing. None of this was making sense to her.
    â€œHere.” She took off her one-carat diamond and white gold engagement ring and handed it to him. As much as she loved her engagement ring it meant nothing if Spade didn’t want her to be his wife.
    Breaking eye contact with her, Spade looked down at the floor and said, “You can keep the ring.”
    Her jaw dropped. That’s it? she thought. She felt angry. Her eyes narrowed, and giving him a scathing look, she hissed, “Why won’t you talk to me? Something is wrong! I can feel it.” She wiped her face.
    He stood up, turned his back to her, and paused as if he had something else to say. She waited, hoping he would turn around and tell her he didn’t mean it.
    When he didn’t say anything she said, “What am I supposed to tell my family and friends?”
    Apparently at a loss, he raised his hands in the air and sighed. “I don’t know.” Then he dropped his head and headed toward the front door.
    â€œWait! Did I do something?”
    â€œNo. You didn’t do anything. I never meant to hurt you.”
    She was tempted to beg him to stay, but she remembered hearing Oprah talk about the man she pleaded with God to bring back, and in the end she thanked God for letting him go. Although she doubted that she would ever be thankful for losing Spade, she didn’t stop him from leaving.
    She locked the door behind him and allowed the fresh tears that had been hovering around the borders of her eyes to escape. She pressed her back against the door and slid down to the floor. Knees bent and her arms wrapped around to hold them in place, she cried in her lap. She