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found myself feeling protective of a
girl…I wanted to keep her safe and that was a new feeling.

Eighteen
    (Lexi)
    I woke up and looked around the room…where the hell was
I? I crawled in bed again with some guy and remembered nothing! I turned to
look over to the stranger lying next me as I always did and I almost screamed.
Kole…oh shit! I guess I could forget about not wanting him to know this side of
me…he had seen it firsthand. I couldn’t believe I slept with him…out of all the
times I had screwed someone and woke up blank…this would have been the one time
I wanted to remember. The next few steps I took were entirely too
familiar…sneak out of the bed-find my clothes…wait I still had on my pants and
my bra.
    What the hell happened? Maybe we didn’t sleep together. I
stood at the end of his bed looking down at him silently admiring his muscular
back and how the tattoo ran all the way down his arm. His arms were so defined
and sexy. I wish I could remember last night were those around me...did we
kiss…anything?
    I turned to grab my shirt off the floor and was startled
by Kole’s scruffy voice, “You don’t have to sneak off.” I kept my back to him
as I released the breath I was holding in, “I wasn’t trying to sneak…I was just
leaving.” He didn’t say anything but I could hear the movement of the sheets on
his body as he crawled out of bed. I suddenly felt him close behind me. I could
smell his cologne, “Nothing happened between us Lexi. You just slept here. I
didn’t want anything bad to happen to you.” I hated the thought of him seeing
me last night I knew I had to be ridiculous considering I remembered nothing.
 I was embarrassed I did not want him to have that opinion of me. I would
not admit it to anyone but myself but I cared what he thought of me…that is why
I can never get to close because then he would know just how horrible I am.
    I knew I needed to get out of there, “You shouldn’t worry
about me Kole. I don’t need you to. I don’t really need anyone too.” I walked
for the door as he came up quickly behind me. I felt his arms wrap around my
waist and he buried his nose in my hair, “Its’ okay to let people in Lexi…you
can trust me. Just talk to me.” I pulled against him trying to get free, he
slowly released me. After I had the door open and was able to let go of the
entrapped feeling I turned to faced him, “I made the mistake almost six months
ago of trusting the wrong person…I won’t ever make that mistake again.” I
turned quickly and left.
    I kept myself busy over the next couple days. I tried to
avoid Megan and once she figured that out she started staying at Radley’s. I
can’t say it didn’t make things easier but deep down I really missed her. I
wasn’t ready to forgive her yet. I was hurt by the feeling of being betrayed by
my very best friend the one person I trusted with my secrets.
    I was lounging in my pajamas on Tuesday night watching
some really bad reality TV when my phone beeped indicating an incoming text. I
crawled slowly out of bed and walked over to the desk were it was charging.
When I opened it I immediately felt ill…
    ‘You made one huge mistake bitch! You opened your
mouth and you’ll be sorry!’
    The next text was worse than the first.
    ‘Don’t worry I let Kole know just what kind of person
he is dealing with…I nasty little Slut. Now I know where you are…Shut your
fucking mouth!’
    I sunk to the floor and cried. It had been so long since
I cried so hard. I dialed Megan’s number and after the first ring she picked
up, “Lex…Lexi are you there?” I attempted to talk through the sobs, “Can
y-you…co-come home pl...please?” I held back as much as possible but I felt
terrified and knew it was only a matter of time before I lost it all over
again. “I am on the way now…Stay where you are Lexi,” she sounded out of breath
like she may have been running…
     
    I heard the door rattle and I scrambled for