Read Broken for Free Online Page B

into anything.”
    “I understand.  Thank you so much.  I can’t even begin to tell you what this means to me.” 
    Her mother’s words are still haunting me hours later as I try to finish my work. Nothing comes to mind that I could use to break down the walls Jenny has built around herself.  She wants me to believe she’s this iceberg, void of any kind of human feelings, but her body told me a different story.  I felt her tremble under my touch and I wanted so much more.  She is my unhealthy addiction, the only thing I want to taste each morning when I first open my eyes, the one thing I want to touch right before I go to sleep. 
    I haven’t seen Jenny since that day.  I’ve watched her house from time to time—not in a creepy way, mind you, hoping to get at least a glimpse of her face.  No such luck, so far. 
    I know all about hurt, hell, I’ve lived it after Becky died.  It’s not like I forgot that morning call that changed our lives forever.  The day I was informed by some stranger that my wife had been killed in a car accident.  I knew pain and its effects, and Jenny had endured more than enough.  I had to find a way to get her to see me. 
     
     
     

Chapter 6
     
    Jen
    The weeks go by uneventfully and I have to force myself to leave the house just to see Dr. Collins.  As the time goes by, I start feeling more and more at home in my new place and yet still lonely.  For months now I’ve managed to avoid David, but I know soon I will have to face reality and accept the fact that there might be something there between us, however small.  I mean, for the first time in a long while I actually don’t mind someone’s company.  Am I in love?  Not by a long shot.  But I do like him… I think.  No matter how long goes by without seeing him, my heart still does this strange thing, as I think of the few touches we’ve exchanged. 
    The day my mother walked out of my house crying was the day I decided to get my life back.  It was the really cold, hard slap I needed to realize that something had to change.  I was too much of a coward to follow Sam to the other side, and loved my mom too much to keep causing her so much pain.  That very day I made the difficult but important phone call to Dr. Collins, and, as expected, she was more than happy to help me.
    “Very well dear,” she said when I asked if she would see me the next day. “I was actually going to take the day off and do some shopping, but I’ll make an exception for you.  Be here around eleven, not a moment later.”
    I wish I could tell you that I had a restful sleep that night but I would be lying.  The truth is I didn’t sleep a wink, as thoughts of Sam and what could’ve been were haunting me.  I know if he were alive and I was gone, I would want the best for him.  I would want him to move on no matter how hard it is to acknowledge that.  It is simply the truth.  We all want the people we love to be happy. Always. 
    As I am getting ready for my meeting with Dr. Collins, I try to prepare myself for whatever she’s going to have me do. I know it won’t be easy; after all, I’ve been this way for over five years, and I’m sure I’m not going get my life back just by the snap of her fingers.  I’ll have to face my demons and fight them back with all I got.  Not just for my mom but for me also.
    I dress in comfortable and warm clothes: jeans and a cashmere turtleneck.  I hide my hair under the knitted hat that my mom gave me last Christmas and slide my arms into the heavy coat, praying I won’t freeze my buns on the way.  The moment I step outside, the wind cuts through the layers of my clothes and I wonder if maybe I should drive there.  I decide the walk will do me good and help me clear my head.  I pass David’s house and force myself not to look up, just in case he might be at his kitchen window. 
    The streets are covered with fresh snow and I know by midnight the whole street is going to look like a