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of the glass and said, “Well. About time! The guy’s a total dickhead. So what happened?”
    I literally gasped. No one had ever said anything like that about Nick. Everyone loved him. He was student council president. He was MVP of the rugby and hockey teams. He was athletic and good-looking and polite and an excellent student too.
    Carly loves Nick . I realized I was breathing too hard.
    Dolores put two fingers to her lips and went, “Ooooh. That bad, eh?”
    That did it. I didn’t just feel uncomfortable any more. Suddenly, I felt angry too. I was angry at being made to feel uncomfortable.
    â€œYes. That bad,” I said. “I caught Nick kissing Carly Gaetz.” Not precisely true but I hoped it would shock Dolores into her place. Make her feel uncomfortable now.
    Dolores banged her hand on the table and her mouth fell open. “You’re kidding? Carly, like, Gaetz?”
    She started hooting and laughing. I could feel the heat rising up my neck.
    â€œWhat’s so funny?” I said.
    â€œNick Jamieson and Carly Gaetz?” She grinned at the ceiling. “We’re talking Ken and Barbie here, folks! They’re so perfect for each other it’s comical. I can’t believe they didn’t find each other sooner.”
    She took off her glasses and started cleaning them with the napkin she’d licked to wipe the table. “Let them rub their plastic body parts together as much as they want! Who cares? I never understood why you hung out with douchebags like them.” She put her glasses back on and blinked a couple of times.
    Something about Dolores started to creep me out. How did she know all this stuff? How—or more importantly, why—had she bothered to form these opinions about me and my “friends”? I had this horrible feeling that I’d got myself a stalker.
    I sat up a little straighter and tried to sound nonchalant. “So, uh, how’d you know Nick and I were dating?”
    â€œExcusez-moi?” Dolores coughed like the dying hero in some bad play. “You think I’ve been in solitary confinement or something? You’ve clearly let my ghostly pallor deceive you. I’m not totally out of it, you know. By Citadel High standards, you’re like Beyoncé and”—she spun her hand in the air and looked around the café for inspiration—”and … Bob the Builder or Adolf Hitler or something. Everybody knows who you are. Andeverybody knows that Nick and Carly are douchebags. Or if they don’t, they should.”
    Dolores might not have been a stalker but she was definitely insane. Nick and Carly were the most popular kids at school. I had to get out of here.
    â€œYeah, well. Whatever. That’s all behind me now, I guess.” I started to slide out of the booth.
    â€œReally? Don’t you guys all work at Jitters Coffeehouse? That must be, like, mucho awkward.”
    I tapped my fingers on the table. I could almost hear myself snap. I was going to shut this girl up once and for all.
    â€œI don’t work there any more,” I said. My voice, my eyes, my lips were flat. “There’s where I caught them kissing. Now I’ve got to find myself another job so I can make enough money to get out of this hell hole. I was going to start a housecleaning service but decided against it. That’s why I’m leaving right now to Google ‘summer employment Halifax’ … Anything else you’d like to know? My social insurance number perhaps? My Facebook password?” I didn’t even pretend to smile.
    â€œOooh. Shouldn’t be giving that type of information out to strangers!” Dolores swung her feet back onto the floor and leaned across the table. “I would, however, like to know why you decided against the cleaning service. I mean, what’s the matter with you? That’s a brilliant idea!”
    Dolores couldn’t even compliment a person without