Read Backstage (The Barter System Book 4) for Free Online

work, and a bad-tempered man who attempts to slap her across the face and finds himself beaten on the floor. 
    One by one is verbally thrashed by Mikayla amidst the cheers of the audience at her cleverness.  Dancing away after her experience with each, her growing anger and frustration is clear. 
    Her first full musical number was a soulful tune about men being the bane of her existence.  The bluesy feel offset the hysterical lyrics punctuated by the laughter of the crowd. 
    No matter how many times Isaiah had heard her sing it, it continued to make him smile. 
    The second act built on the comedic element of the first, with Madeline in her role as a gypsy matchmaker, disguised in a full body suit, latex makeup, and gray-haired wig.  She played off Mikayla’s character flawlessly. 
    Stepping out of her small home – the trailer that now resembled a gypsy cart from the Middle Ages – she started to bring her crystal ball, shrugged, and tossed it carelessly to her husband inside. 
    The song the sisters sang together was a naughty limerick about finding the perfect man.  Several men in the theater groaned after particularly saucy lines. 
    “One man who isn’t a loser…is that too much to ask?”
    The gypsy grinned.  “Nah, there’s some good ones…you gotta be willing to sift through the recyclables though.”  Hands on her hips, she shook her head.  “The perfect man, per se, does not exist.  The perfect woman either but, eh, we tend to get closer to the mark.  However, you can mold one out of raw materials if he has good bones.  What you need is a fixer upper!”
    “A fixer upper?”
    “A man with some potential that you can train not to pee on the carpet or hump your guests’ legs.  You have to be willing to do the work , girl!”
    “I am…I’m willing to do the work.  Where do we start?”
    The old woman grabbed a passing man and circled him.  “Let’s see what we have here.  Check him out, honey.  Don’t be shy.  Even when you buy a horse to tow your cart, you want him to have some get up and go, if you know what I’m saying.”
    “Um…not really.”
    “Mental note to school you on owning your sass.”  She rubbed her hands together.  “Now, you’re not a bad-looking fellow but you seem a little slouchy.  Stand up straight, boy!  You have a possible female customer and you boys need to take that seriously.  As long as we control the hoo-ha, you need to put in a little effort!”
    For almost a minute, they peppered him with questions and it was soon clear to the audience that he wasn’t very bright.  With a disgusted look on her face, the gypsy mumbled, “You gotta kiss him.”
    “Ugh!  Why?” 
    A quirk of the old woman’s brow and Mikayla kissed the prospect before pretending to gag.  Waving the guy away, the matchmaker sighed.  “I can work with a lot but a lack of chemistry is fatal.” 
    After two failed attempts, they chose a man who seemed to fit the basic requirements.  Rushing him into the store, they worked together to give him an overhaul.  His clothes and hair received an update before they tutored him on proper manners and dancing. 
    Their efforts were watched by the laughing audience through the large store window.  The three of them left the shop and Kayla walked around him with a critical eye. 
    Shaking her head, she muttered, “I suppose he’ll have to do.”
    “Girl, we settle.  You think I didn’t settle?” 
    Pointing to her small trailer, she snapped her fingers.  The gypsy’s husband can be seen through the window.  He’s a pot-bellied man with an elaborate comb-over, reclined in a La-Z-Boy, and his eyes glued to a football game.  Unconcerned about anything happening around him, he wore baggy boxers and a stained t-shirt. 
    When he released an impressive burp, the old woman’s face contorted in complete disgust.  “I run my business.  He scratches his balls.  Thank god he takes care of the horses because his days of