Read Thicker than Water for Free Online Page B

course, now that I have caller ID in my home, it never happens. If I don’t know the name or the number, I don’t answer the phone. The phone-pervs can just leave a message. I didn’t have caller ID at the office, though. The phone rang again, and I answered it. “Hello.”
    â€œTorie, it’s Collette,” a voice said. My best friend Collette, the big-city girl. Of course, the big city I refer to is St. Louis, which is pretty small in the grand scheme of cities. It’s about a half hour to the north of us here in New Kassel.
    â€œHey, what’s up?” I said. “Did you just call here?”
    â€œNo,” she said.
    â€œOh.”
    â€œYour mom called,” she said.
    â€œMy mother?” I asked. “Uh-oh.”
    â€œYeah, she said you needed to be taken out and shown a good time.”
    â€œOh, right. My mother did not say that!”
    â€œOkay, not in so many words, but she said, ‘Call her. She could use your contagious energy.’ So I translated that to mean that I am to take you out and get you as dog-faced drunk as I can and have a great time dancing and maybe sticking some one-dollar bills in some scantily clad muscle-bound man’s underwear.”
    â€œNo.”
    â€œYou always say no.”
    â€œI really can’t. I have tons to do,” I said, fingering the receipts from the private investigator.
    â€œThere’s this really cool band playing in Soulard tonight,” she said. “Everybody there keeps their clothes on.”
    â€œNo. No offense, Collette, but I just really don’t feel like it.”
    â€œAre you all right?” she asked in a slightly more serious voice. “We don’t have to get wild. We could go see a movie.”
    â€œTruth is … I’m a bit … I dunno,” I said, and shrugged as if she could see me.
    â€œDepressed?”
    â€œI am not depressed,” I said. “I’m in … transition and it’s just weird.”
    â€œYou know, you deserve all that money Sylvia left you,” Collette said.
    â€œWhy?”
    â€œBecause you are the only person in that town mourning her. I think she knew you would be, and that’s why she left it all to you,” Collette said.
    â€œThat is not true,” I said. “You should have seen all the people at the funeral. The whole town showed up.”
    â€œProbably making sure she didn’t jump out of the casket at the last minute,” she said.
    â€œCollette!”
    â€œHey, sorry, Torie, but she was a mean old bat. She was even mean to you. You just never let it bother you,” Collette said.
    â€œNo,” I said. “You’re wrong. A lot of people loved her.”
    â€œWhatever. Last offer for a movie.”
    â€œNo thanks.”
    â€œHow about a pizza and conversation with your witty and wonderful best friend?”
    â€œSorry.”
    â€œAll right, your mother can’t say I didn’t try,” she said. “Oh, I hear Mommy Dearest is coming to town.”
    â€œI don’t want to talk about it.”
    â€œYou’re really that upset?”
    â€œI’m not upset because she’s coming for a visit,” I said. “She has the right to come for a visit. I’m upset because she’s staying in my house. It’s like asking a wolf to sleep in a barn with a lamb.”
    â€œYou’re the lamb?” she asked.
    â€œOf course,” I said.
    â€œJust making sure.”
    â€œAnd I’m really upset that Rudy knows this and didn’t even bother to ask me,” I said. “I guess I’m really more angry about that than anything.”
    â€œWell, look at the bright side,” Collette said. “By the time she leaves, your canned food will be organized by color, your plants will be organized alphabetically, your son’s ears will be so clean he’ll be able to hear somebody cough in Guam, and your socks will be