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benefits that can accrue from listening intently and taking notes when I am speaking – something that will invariably draw a chorus of groans from our people who have heard the line one too many times. But, all joking aside, listening and taking notes are clearly habits that have served Stelios well . . . oops, correction, make that Sir Stelios; he was knighted by the Queen in 2006 for ‘services to entrepreneurship’ – and note-taking.
    I can’t promise knighthoods for everyone, but if you’re still not convinced let me suggest you try a self-imposed crash course in listening more and talking less and I promise you will be amazed at the immediate benefits you’ll observe.
    SAY LESS – CONTRIBUTE MORE
    While the late Nelson Mandela was a man of innumerable talents, one that always impressed me the most about him was his unfailing willingness to listen to what others had to say. Even during his long years in prison he took time to listen to what his jailers had to say about life, so much so that he made them the first people he publicly forgave when he was released. Whenever I spent time with Madiba I was amazed at his ability to make you feel like the only and most important person in the room through his desire to hear what you had to say and, of course, his willingness to act on those things he believed in. Few other people could have galvanised the formation of the Elders in the way that Madiba did and yet few people were better qualified to appreciate the critical role the ability to listen plays in diplomacy, business and life in general.
    Another remarkable human being and listener par excellence is Archbishop Desmond Tutu, who as a close friend of Nelson Mandela’s was a founding member of the Elders and chaired the group from 2007 until 2013. Seldom in history has a nation put more faith in the healing power of listening than post-apartheid South Africa did with its Truth and Reconciliation Commission (TRC). President Mandela named Desmond Tutu to chair the historic commission’s work, the primary focus of which was on those who had suffered human rights abuses as a result of apartheid between 1960 and 1994. As stated in the Promotion of National Unity and Reconciliation Act the TRC was convened in order to address ‘a need for understanding but not for vengeance, a need for reparation but not retaliation, a need for Ubuntu [human kindness] but not for victimisation’.
    The commission reportedly received more than 22,000 statements from such victims and held thousands of public hearings at which they testified on the atrocities they had suffered. Under Archbishop Desmond Tutu’s compassionate but no-nonsense leadership the commission received in excess of 7,000 amnesty applications, held some 3,000 amnesty hearings and granted more than 1,500 amnesties. As with any such polarising issue, the TRC’s work had its critics but was considered by most to have been an unprecedented success in healing wounds that, if left untreated, could have become festering sores for generations to come.
    Among the Elders, two equally remarkably listeners whom I have been lucky enough to get to know, are former US president Jimmy Carter and Mary Robinson, the first woman president of Ireland and UN high commissioner for human rights. No matter what the subject, they both possess an incredible talent to tune in intensely to what’s being said – I am a firm believer that the kind of wisdom such people manage to accumulate and dispense is directly attributable to their extraordinary listening skills. What they have said and done is what the history books will post as their legacies, but their greatest achievements are all down to what they were able to absorb by the simple act of listening.
    ‘AS I WAS INTERRUPTING . . . ’
    When you start trying to become a better listener the first difference you’ll notice is similar to how you see things after you’ve lost some weight. It’s only once you manage to