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devastating handicap so you could prove the indestructibility of your spirit.
    Maybe you needed to survive the devastating loss of your child so you could save thousands of others. Maybe you needed to bottom out on drugs, alcohol, or self-loathing before you could muster up the courage to take responsibility for your life. All of our traumas 33
    T h e S e c r e t o f t h e S h a d o w and emotional issues exist in order to support us in the unfolding of our highest selves. Many of our most important ingredients are hidden under a veil of pain. This pain is encoded with vital information and wisdom that we need to assemble our unique gifts.
    There is nobody who can teach what you can teach. There is nobody who can offer your unique perspective. Until you see the perfection of all your ingredients, you will constantly be trying to change, fix, and heal your story rather than using it for the Divine purpose for which it was intended.
    T h e P a i n o f H at i n g Y o u r R e c i p e Most of us spend the majority of our lives judging the ingredients in our recipe—making what’s inside us wrong. We say, “I have too many eggs” or “There’s not enough sugar” or “If only I had more spice . . .” In other words, we reject some aspects of ourselves while we embrace others. For as long as she can remember, my girlfriend Shirley was told that she had a big mouth. She used to get into trouble at school for talking too much and felt like an outsider in her circle of friends because it wasn’t cool to have so many opinions. Even her family was embarrassed by her outspokenness and cautioned her on more than one occasion to tone it down a bit.
    Shirley spent the first twenty-plus years of her life hating this ingredient in her recipe and tried unsuccessfully many times to get rid of it.
    One day, while attending her favorite sociology class in college, Shirley was passionately speaking out as usual. After the 34
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    class, her professor took Shirley aside and said, “You talk so much!
    Have you ever considered pursuing a career in radio? You could get paid to talk all day long!” Suddenly a light flashed in Shirley’s mind and she saw a huge gift in this ingredient that she had always considered to be a curse. Shirley went on to create an award-winning radio show, and today she enjoys a rewarding career as an outspoken and well-loved radio talk-show host.
    It is not an easy task to see the perfection of your wounds and inadequacies, but there are no accidents. You—and I mean all of you—are Divine. You might not be expressing the Divine in your current form, but I assure you that once you transform your emotional wounds you will see their perfection. Take horse manure, for example. If you went for a walk in the country and found a pile of manure on your path, you would probably cringe and back away. But to a master gardener interested in growing the biggest and best roses or adding vibrant color to a crunchy bell pepper, that same pile of manure would look like pure gold. What most of us call poop the gardener calls pure potential, because he recognizes it as just the ingredient he needs to nourish his garden.
    Hating any part of our recipe guarantees that we will attract painful experiences into our lives. Like attracts like. Our unprocessed pain and self-loathing will call forth people and events that will reflect back to us how we feel about ourselves. Whether in the form of accidents, abusive relationships, financial ruin, or bad jobs, we will constantly find ways to beat ourselves up, because we carry a deep-seated belief that who we are is wrong or that what has happened to us is wrong. When we are unable to see the Divinity of our recipe we are doomed to a life of anger, disappointment, wanting, 35
    T h e S e c r e t o f t h e S h a d o w and longing. Our traumas, wounds, disappointments, and pain have come bearing gifts, but until they are integrated they will remain unprocessed lumps