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that his income came from a matrimonial agency, but such games have a way of developing their own meanings and subtleties, so that although we begin by playing them self-indulgently they end by taking charge of us and revealing unexpected facets of our personalities. As months changed into years, and Matrimonial Assistance flourished, and the deception remained immune from detection, its author found a positive pleasure in accentuating his own meekness and timidity at The Laurels in a way which gave additional zest to the exhibition of the very different characteristics of Major Easonby Mellon. There is no difference, Congreve observed, between continued affectation and reality, and Major Mellon proved to Arthur Brownjohn the truth of this aphorism. He was self-assured where Arthur was hesitant, brusque where he was compliant, an eager eater and drinker where Arthur was a frugal one. That is, Major Mellon became all of these things by pleasant experimentation. He developed also a quite unArthurian liking for a bit of nonsense, first made manifest when a woman aspirant to marriage began to take off her clothes in the office one day, and the Major found himself eagerly helping her.
    Joan was the most notable of several bits of nonsense. She had turned up one day after writing a letter, a good-natured plump woman in her late twenties, whose husband had been killed in Korea. On that first afternoon she had succumbed to the Major’s advances, and thereafter he took her to a hotel every weekday for a fortnight. It was the sort of situation that had to be resolved in one way or another partly because Joan, although rather vague, had realised that the matrimonial agency did not occupy the whole of his time, partly because he felt an urgent need for some relief from Clare. Marriage was the answer, marriage and the setting up of a second, quite distinct home for his second personality. Arthur Brownjohn was terrified by the idea, but Major Easonby Mellon carried it through joyfully.
    He explained to Joan that his status as a member of UGLI 3 was supposed to preclude marriage, but that for her sake he was prepared to risk it so long as the ceremony was kept absolutely quiet. They signed the register at Caxton Hall in the presence of witnesses brought in from the street, Joan found and rented the apartment in Clapham, and Major Mellon transferred his effects to it. These chiefly consisted of clothes, and Joan exclaimed in wonder at the quality of his suits. Arthur Brownjohn bought his clothes ready made, but Easonby Mellon’s tweeds came from Corefinch and Burleigh just off Savile Row, one of the most expensive tailors in London. Clare had always been incurious about Arthur’s business, and when he said that he would have to be away very often in the middle of the week because he was taking over the work of their Midlands and Northern representatives her reaction was simply one of alarm that business might be falling off. Reassured on this point she adapted herself with only occasional grumbles to the absences from home necessitated by his additional work.
    So a new pattern of life was fixed for him. From Friday to Monday Arthur Brownjohn was to be found at The Laurels, from Tuesday to Thursday Major Easonby Mellon put up his slippered feet on the sofa at Elm Drive. The wig and beard proved to be the triumphant success that had been predicted. He shaved each morning with an electric razor, and washed only cursorily, taking care to keep water away from the beard. Even in the greatest ardours of their married life Joan did not suspect his secret. Occasionally he varied the pattern of his weekly activities a little, but not very much, for he felt in it a symmetry like that in a work of art. At times he really did make a tour of Birmingham, Manchester, Leeds and other cities in which Lektreks still had customers. And if Joan, that perpetually amiable and resilient cushion, was an almost perfect partner for the part of his nature represented