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to it.' And he moved off along the bar to pull a brace of beers.
    'A gold piece?' whispered Eddie. 'That's pushing it a bit.'
    Jack shrugged. 'I was only backing you up. You can always tell him it was a mistake if you want and say you gave him the right money.'
    'Oh no,' whispered Eddie. 'A gold piece is fine. I must remember that in future.'
    Tinto returned and presented Eddie and Jack with their beers and Eddie with a great deal of change. 'Cheers,' said Eddie, taking his glass carefully between his paws and pouring beer messily into his face.
    'Cheers,' said Jack, doing likewise, though without the mess. The glass was tiny. Jack drained it with a single gulp and ordered another.
    'So, Eddie,' said Tinto, doing the business for Jack, who paid with the change from his trouser pocket. 'Any word from Bill?'
    'No,' said Eddie, manoeuvring his glass back onto the bar counter. 'He's been gone for a week now. But I'm sure he'll be back very soon.'
    'Who's Bill?’ Jack asked as Tinto passed him a new beer.
    'My partner,' said Eddie.
    Tinto laughed, a sound like small stones being shaken about in an empty tin can.
    'All right, my
owner,'
said Eddie. 'Bill Winkie, the famous detective. I'm Bill's bear; I told you in the alleyway, Jack.'
    'Bill Winkie?' Jack took a gulp and placed his latest empty glass on the counter. 'Bill Winkie, Private Eye?'
    'The same,' said Eddie.
    'I've read the books,' said Jack.
    'I never get a mention,' said Eddie.
    'No, you don't, but that's not the point.'
    'It is to me. Without me he'd never solve a single case. I'm the brains behind that man.'
    'That's really
not
the point,' said Jack. 'The point is that Bill Winkie is a fictional detective. He's not a real person.'
    'He seems pretty real to me.' Eddie took up his glass once more and poured beer into his face. 'From the brim of his snap-brimmed Fedora to the toes of his smelly old socks.'
    'You're telling me that Bill Winkie is real?'
    'As real as.'
    'Hm,' went Jack. 'It follows.'
    'Eddie's not kidding you around,' said Tinto. 'He really does solve most of Bill's cases. He's a natural, a born detective.'
    'Cheers,' said Eddie. 'I appreciate that.'
    'Credit where credit's due,' said Tinto. 'But you'll only get that credit here. And I don't even give credit. This is a cash-only establishment.'
    'What he means,' said Eddie, 'is that toys have no status. This may be Toy City, but toys have to know their place. Step out of line and you turn up missing.'
    'I don't really understand,' said Jack.
    'The status quo,' said Eddie. 'I'm a teddy. I'm supposed to do teddy things. Eat porridge, picnic in the woods, be cuddly, stufflike that.' Eddie made a face and spat sawdust.
    'Arid you're not keen?' said Jack.
    'I'm a bear with brains. I have ambitions.'
    'About the brains,' said Jack. 'I have been wondering about those.'
    'Oh yeah?' Eddie patted at his head with a paw. 'You've been wondering how a head full of sawdust can actually think?'
    'It had crossed my mind, yes.'
    'And so how does your brain think?'
    'It's a brain, that's what it does.'
    'It's a piece of meat,' said Eddie. 'And how does a piece of meat think? You tell me!'
    'Well...' said Jack.
    'You don't know,' said Eddie. 'Nobody knows. Except perhaps for Mr Anders. He knows almost everything.'
    'And who is Mr Anders?'
    'The kindly, loveable white-haired old Toymaker. He birthed me and everyone else in this bar, with the exception of you.'
    'So why don't you speak to him about this status quo business? Tell him you want your recognition?'
    'Er, no,' said Eddie. 'The Toyniaker made me to be a teddy and do teddy things. The fact that I don't care to do them is my business. So I'll just keep my business to myself.'
    'Or turn up missing?'
    'I don't want to think about it.'
    'So don't. Let's drink. Do you want me to turn you upside down yet?'
    'No, not yet, but thanks anyway. You're all right, Jack. I like you.'
    'I like you too, Eddie, cheers.' Jack raised his glass, but it was empty.
    Eddie raised his, but