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then I knew how mashed potatoes feel.
    The Gila monster hung us by our tails from the high dive.
    "Bye-bye, Gecko and bird," he said. "When they find you—too late. I will have my revenge."
    "Hang in there," Nadine snickered.
    They left. We hung upside down, like a couple of bats. My stomach growled and I daydreamed about spicy red fire ants in cream sauce.
    "Well, look on the bright side," said Natalie. "It could be worse."
    I gave her a disgusted look. "How?"
    "He could have turned on the automatic pool chlornator."

    A switch clicked somewhere in the building. A deep humming was followed by the hiss of something bubbling through the pool's filters.
    The smell made my eyes water. Chlorine gas.
    "Thanks a lot, Natalie," I said.

18 Hanging by a Tail
    We coughed and blinked our watery eyes as the chlorine gas bubbled in the pool below. What a way to go—slowly stunk to death.

    "So, about our partnership," said Natalie. She knew I wasn't going anywhere. "Is this a good time to talk?"
    "All right, all right!" I said. "I guess ... you can be my partner—if we ever get out of here."
    "That's great, Chet! Thanks."
    I grunted. "Don't mention it."
    We watched the pool bubble and the sun crawl lower in the sky out the window. A big clock ticked on the wall, counting down the minutes to Herman's revenge.
    From the football field came a sound like a porcupine sitting on a bagpipe. The band was tuning up. Or maybe that was their first number; I couldn't tell.

    "Hey, Chet," said Natalie. "As long as we're just hanging here, let's finish solving the mystery."
    "Good idea. So ... we know Herman is going to do something with his 'little friends' to disrupt the game." I furrowed my brow. "What else did he say?"
    "The kickoff is the first surprise," said Natalie. "Now, what could be so surprising about a kickoff?"
    I coughed on the chlorine fumes. "Well, they could steal the football."
    "Nah," she said. "Too easy. And the team could get another ball."
    My mind flashed on Herman's visit to the dump.
    "What if they switched the ball?" I said. "Maybe Herman made an exploding ball with stuff they found at the dump."
    Natalie and I looked at each other. "Nah," we said together.
    Herman couldn't make toast without an instruction book. It had to be something simpler.
    "Garbage!" I said. "He filled a football with garbage, and it's going to get all over the team when they kick off."

    "Now we're cooking!" said Natalie. She gave me an upside-down grin. "Chet, you do some serious thinking when the blood runs to your head. You should do your homework upside down."

    "Never mind the compliments," I said. "Let's solve the rest of this. There was an
M
on Billy's map—
M
for mashed potatoes?
M
for muffins?"
    Natalie turned in her ropes. The movement made her swing slowly in circles. "Chet, get your mind off food!"
    "M-m-m-mascot! It's the school mascot. Now, what was it Herman said?"
    Natalie's eyes grew big. "Even the mascot would wish it had never been born. Oh, Chet! Do you think Herman's going to destroy our Golden Gopher?"
    "That ugly statue? I'd help him."
    "Chet!" Natalie huffed.
    "I'm kidding, I'm kidding. You're right, Natalie. He's going to grab the statue while everyone's distracted." I twisted my arms against the ropes. "Now if only we could get out of here, we could stop Herman and free Billy."
    "Well, partner." Natalie sighed. "Looks like Herman wins this round."
    I hated to admit it, but she was right. We were hanging from the diving board and choking on chlorine instead of sticking right to Herman's tail.
    Wait a minute!

    "Not so fast," I said. "He may be strong, but he's no smart cookie. Herman forgot one thing."
    "What's that?" she asked.
    "We geckos have a secret weapon."
    And with that, I detached my tail and splashed down into the pool.

19 Revenge on the Fifty-Yard Line
    Given a choice, most geckos would rather visit the dentist than go swimming. I wriggled out of that overchlornated pool fast as I could, and crawled