The Book of Even More Awesome

Read The Book of Even More Awesome for Free Online

Book: Read The Book of Even More Awesome for Free Online
Authors: Neil Pasricha
just feels like sweet release.
    Or so I’ve heard.
    AWESOME!

When you suddenly remember it’s a long weekend
    Monday is the new Sunday. First off, your TV-watching schedule is messed up. The baseball game was last night so now you’re flipping past Wheel of Fortune and sitcom reruns. But no big deal, because even though the night before school or work is a bit of a drag, you can at least rest knowing you’ve got a four-day week ahead.
    Sunday is the new Saturday . Now you can make late night plans without excuses. No sister-in-laws zipping up diaper bags and tying kids’ shoelaces in the front hallway at 8:30 p.m. this time. Nope, on long-weekend Sundays the party’s just getting started, so toss the seven-year-old on the bed full of jackets and get back to rocking.
    Saturday is Uncharted Territory . This is the Bermuda Triangle of the long weekend. You’ve got two more days to finish your algebra homework, plant the tulip bulbs, or mow the lawn, so that all falls off the radar. Yes, today’s the day for a glue movie marathon, long drive to see the grandkids, or late night out with your old friends from high school.
    When you suddenly remember it’s a long weekend it’s time for some head spins. Your brain races with possibilities ahead and you’re filled with a tingly buzz of excitement. Yes, you ran up the bumpy hills of Monday and Tuesday, scraped by a muddy Wednesday, and clawed through the frozen tundra of Thursday and Friday.
    Now you’re at the top of the mountain breathing the fresh air of the long weekend.
    And it is glorious.
    AWESOME!

When two cookies melt together in the oven
    If you’re lucky the edges of both cookies had a little bit of burn time to harden and brown before congealing into one giant Siamese cookie masterpiece . Now they’re stuck together in a crispy brown sugar suture that becomes your mouthwatering reward for baking a big beautiful batch of
    AWESOME!

Elementary school science fairs
    It all starts with poster board.
    Getting mom to drive to the drugstore to load up on the thick flimsy is a great start to a great project. Grab a sheet of white, a sheet of neon pink, and if you’re lucky, one of those thick cardboard three-folds . Come on, we both know that cardboard added scientific integrity to your research—the seventh-grade equivalent of getting your work published in The New England Journal of Awesome .
    But it doesn’t end there. Next you’re grabbing markers, spray paint, baking soda, and Styrofoam. Once you’ve got everything together you’re rushing home and getting down to science , people. The carpeted corner of the unfinished basement becomes your lab and it’s time to spend hours putting on lab coats, staring into microscopes , and pouring bubbling green liquids into beakers.
    Let’s count down six of the classics:
    6. The solar system . Jabbing those spray-painted Styrofoam balls with a straightened-out coat hanger makes a great splintery sound. Next you’re painting a splotchy brown Australia on Earth and a big eye on Jupiter. If you want your solar system to be to scale, don’t forget to leave Pluto at home and toss Neptune out the car window on the way to school.
    5. Volcano. There are two types of eruptions. First, there’s the Underwhelming Fizz—where you stare deep into the mouth of the fiery beast only to witness some rock-hard hunks of baking soda floating in a pool of nostril-burning vinegar. It’s disappointing, but you can always try again and hope for a Superblow—where everyone stares with wide eyes as red ooze bubbles and slides down your carefully painted volcano onto the GI Joe townspeople below.
    4. The one the kid’s parents obviously did . Also known as robbing your child of the thrill of scientific discovery in exchange for a B+. Come on, Dad, we all know Junior didn’t build that perfectly functioning lawnmower engine.
    3. Growing something

Similar Books

When Elves Attack

Tim Dorsey

The Secret Heiress

Judith Gould

LOST AND FOUND HUSBAND

Sheri Whitefeather

Invitation to Ruin

Ann Vremont

Rival Demons

Sarra Cannon

Djinn Rummy

Tom Holt

Barnacle Love

Anthony de Sa