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and they’re worth, like, billions. Plus, I heard Lauren’s going to have her own reality series on TeenNick,” Sheridan told them as she carefully applied the balm to her chapped lips.
    Lili recoiled, and she could see her friends chafe at that revelation as well. Lauren Page, television star? Now that was a blow. Usually only the Ashleys were the subjects of such celebrated gossip. Lauren’s makeover was way more successful than they had given hercredit for. Lili wondered what Ashley would do about it and wasn’t surprised when Ashley motioned Sheridan closer.
    â€œKeep it,” Ashley said, waving away the lip balm Sheridan held out. “Now, I don’t like to say stuff about people, but I heard something about Lauren’s family,” she said, in her most self-righteous voice. Lili was always impressed at how Ashley was able to preface her catty comments with a goody-goody disclaimer so that she wouldn’t look too snotty, and somehow, it always worked.
    Sheridan looked eagerly at Ashley, waiting to hear whatever rumor she might be about to reveal.
    â€œYou’re not going to tell anybody, right?” Ashley asked.
    Sheridan shook her head and made an X sign above her chest. The girl lived to spread dirt on everyone.
    Ashley sighed as if it broke her heart to disclose what she was about to say. She motioned the girls even closer. “It’s all Mafia money.” She looked at Lili and A. A. to back her up, and both girls nodded in agreement.
    â€œSerious?” Sheridan asked, eyes wide, lapping up every word.
    â€œSerious.”
    â€œHuge crime family,” A. A. added wisely. “Like the Sopranos? But worse.”
    â€œAnd that makeover? It’s so sad,” said Lili, deciding it was time to get in on the game. “It’s a cry for help.”
    â€œWhy? She looks so cute! I wish I had her nose,” Sheridan said, touching her huge honker.
    â€œIf you did, you’d be a pigface too.” Lili told her somberly. An idea was starting to form in her head. This was so wrong, but she couldn’t help herself, especially when she saw the grin beginning to spread on Ashley’s face.
    â€œWhat do you mean?” asked Sheridan, her face flushed and eager. She craned her neck to look across the room, watching Lauren walk back toward them.
    â€œYou know how they use pig organs now in surgery?” Lili asked, as if imparting some really important information. She pulled her hair back behind her ears and looked Sheridan in the eye. “Doctors putting pig livers and pig hearts in people?”
    Sheridan nodded. “Yeah, I’ve heard of that.”
    â€œWell, they do it in plastic surgery now too. Let’s just say that Lauren has a new snout ,” Lili revealed. Then she pinched her nose and made an oinking noise.
    Sheridan looked from one Ashley to another. “You’rejoking. She got a nose job? No way.” This was even better than when they told her about Melody Myers peeing in her pants during the sixth-grade field trip. They called Melody “Peezilla” and “The Princess and the Pee” for weeks.
    â€œWay.” Ashley nodded vigorously, pointing to her own slim button nose. “The tip? One hundred percent pork.”
    A. A. snorted into her teacup. Control yourself, A. A., Lili thought.
    â€œOmigod.” Sheridan started giggling uncontrollably. She was still laughing when she walked across the room to tell her friends what the Ashleys had just told her.
    Lili smiled at her friends. Pigface Mafia Princess. Priceless. Of course, it was so outrageous it couldn’t possibly be true. But try telling that to the gossip-mad girls at Miss Gamble’s.
    When Lauren returned, the three of them were doubled over, clutching their stomachs in laughter.
    â€œWhat’s so funny?” she asked, looking at the other girls.
    â€œNothing,” said Ashley, the very picture of angelic virtue.
    Lili