and theyâre worth, like, billions. Plus, I heard Laurenâs going to have her own reality series on TeenNick,â Sheridan told them as she carefully applied the balm to her chapped lips.
Lili recoiled, and she could see her friends chafe at that revelation as well. Lauren Page, television star? Now that was a blow. Usually only the Ashleys were the subjects of such celebrated gossip. Laurenâs makeover was way more successful than they had given hercredit for. Lili wondered what Ashley would do about it and wasnât surprised when Ashley motioned Sheridan closer.
âKeep it,â Ashley said, waving away the lip balm Sheridan held out. âNow, I donât like to say stuff about people, but I heard something about Laurenâs family,â she said, in her most self-righteous voice. Lili was always impressed at how Ashley was able to preface her catty comments with a goody-goody disclaimer so that she wouldnât look too snotty, and somehow, it always worked.
Sheridan looked eagerly at Ashley, waiting to hear whatever rumor she might be about to reveal.
âYouâre not going to tell anybody, right?â Ashley asked.
Sheridan shook her head and made an X sign above her chest. The girl lived to spread dirt on everyone.
Ashley sighed as if it broke her heart to disclose what she was about to say. She motioned the girls even closer. âItâs all Mafia money.â She looked at Lili and A. A. to back her up, and both girls nodded in agreement.
âSerious?â Sheridan asked, eyes wide, lapping up every word.
âSerious.â
âHuge crime family,â A. A. added wisely. âLike the Sopranos? But worse.â
âAnd that makeover? Itâs so sad,â said Lili, deciding it was time to get in on the game. âItâs a cry for help.â
âWhy? She looks so cute! I wish I had her nose,â Sheridan said, touching her huge honker.
âIf you did, youâd be a pigface too.â Lili told her somberly. An idea was starting to form in her head. This was so wrong, but she couldnât help herself, especially when she saw the grin beginning to spread on Ashleyâs face.
âWhat do you mean?â asked Sheridan, her face flushed and eager. She craned her neck to look across the room, watching Lauren walk back toward them.
âYou know how they use pig organs now in surgery?â Lili asked, as if imparting some really important information. She pulled her hair back behind her ears and looked Sheridan in the eye. âDoctors putting pig livers and pig hearts in people?â
Sheridan nodded. âYeah, Iâve heard of that.â
âWell, they do it in plastic surgery now too. Letâs just say that Lauren has a new snout ,â Lili revealed. Then she pinched her nose and made an oinking noise.
Sheridan looked from one Ashley to another. âYouârejoking. She got a nose job? No way.â This was even better than when they told her about Melody Myers peeing in her pants during the sixth-grade field trip. They called Melody âPeezillaâ and âThe Princess and the Peeâ for weeks.
âWay.â Ashley nodded vigorously, pointing to her own slim button nose. âThe tip? One hundred percent pork.â
A. A. snorted into her teacup. Control yourself, A. A., Lili thought.
âOmigod.â Sheridan started giggling uncontrollably. She was still laughing when she walked across the room to tell her friends what the Ashleys had just told her.
Lili smiled at her friends. Pigface Mafia Princess. Priceless. Of course, it was so outrageous it couldnât possibly be true. But try telling that to the gossip-mad girls at Miss Gambleâs.
When Lauren returned, the three of them were doubled over, clutching their stomachs in laughter.
âWhatâs so funny?â she asked, looking at the other girls.
âNothing,â said Ashley, the very picture of angelic virtue.
Lili