special. Of course, given the state of our finances, it had to be somewhere special on a budget. We’d gone camping up in the woods. Brendan had decked out the tent with a lantern and loads of quilts and blankets so we wouldn’t freeze. It was early May, but it was still too cold to be sleeping outside. He’d packed a picnic for us and insisted that we have dinner before starting.
“So should I take my clothes off?” I’d motioned to my T-shirt. “I brought condoms too, in case you didn’t have any.”
“Where’s the romance?” Brendan had asked, wiping the last of the red velvet cake from his mouth.
I’d rolled my eyes at him. “Aren’t you the one who says romance is the ultimate con?” I poked him in the stomach. “You don’t have to pretend with me. I’ve already agreed to sleep with you. Heck, I’m the one who asked you. Think of it as a favor for a friend. And if you want romance, condoms scream romance. It’s the gift that says, ‘I care enough to make sure you don’t get some kind of disease or end up knocked up.’ See? I’ve got both your practical and romantic sides covered.”
Brendan had shifted uncomfortably. “Are you sure you want to do this? The first time is sort of a big deal.”
“Can you even remember the name of the first girl you slept with?” I’d asked. I was getting nervous the more we talked about it.
“It’s different for girls,” Brendan had said.
“Maybe for some girls. I’ve never been the type to write my name in a heart with a guy’s. I don’t save flowers from dances or any of that overemotional stuff. This is something I just want to get over with. It’s bad enough I’m the last virgin in our class. I don’t plan to be the only one at college.”
“You’re not the last virgin in our class.”
“Yes, let’s not forget there’s also Tina, who weighs at least three hundred pounds, and Derek, who wears that T-shirt about Jesus being his best friend. Great company I’m in.”
“Lots of people stay virgins. You don’t need to worry about what other people think or are doing. You’re not as tough and cynical as you want people to believe, you know.”
“You’re not going to turn all Dr. Phil on me, are you?” I leaned back against a pile of quilts.
“I just think it should be something special.” Brendan shrugged.
“You realize how that sounds coming out of your mouth, right?” I’d sighed and rolled over so I could crawl out of the tent. “Forget it. If you don’t want to do it, we won’t.”
“What, you’re going to find someone else?”
“No, Brendan, if you won’t sleep with me, then I intend tosave myself until marriage. Or perhaps I’ll join a nunnery instead and give up the idea of sex altogether.”
I moved closer to the door flap. The whole plan was stupid. I suddenly felt embarrassed, and I wanted to get out of there. Brendan grabbed my wrist before I could leave. He pulled me back and kissed me deeply.
I pulled back, my breath coming faster. “You don’t have to do this.”
“Come here.” Brendan had pulled me closer. “If we’re going to do this, then it will be something you never forget.”
He was right about that. We’d slept together months ago, and every day since then it was there between us. I’d thought my virginity was something that I wanted to ditch, like getting rid of an unwanted, ugly sofa in the living room. I saw it as something that I was practically willing to pay someone to cart away, but it had turned into something else. That night had changed things between us. We’d been friends forever, but now it was different. The moment I woke up in the tent, curled up with him, I knew it had been a mistake. I hadn’t expected to feel anything, and even more importantly, I didn’t want to. There was nowhere for our relationship to go. I was leaving and Brendan was staying. It was just one more thing in my life that was a dead end.
chapter seven
K eeper’s Cove was on the west side of
“So should I take my clothes off?” I’d motioned to my T-shirt. “I brought condoms too, in case you didn’t have any.”
“Where’s the romance?” Brendan had asked, wiping the last of the red velvet cake from his mouth.
I’d rolled my eyes at him. “Aren’t you the one who says romance is the ultimate con?” I poked him in the stomach. “You don’t have to pretend with me. I’ve already agreed to sleep with you. Heck, I’m the one who asked you. Think of it as a favor for a friend. And if you want romance, condoms scream romance. It’s the gift that says, ‘I care enough to make sure you don’t get some kind of disease or end up knocked up.’ See? I’ve got both your practical and romantic sides covered.”
Brendan had shifted uncomfortably. “Are you sure you want to do this? The first time is sort of a big deal.”
“Can you even remember the name of the first girl you slept with?” I’d asked. I was getting nervous the more we talked about it.
“It’s different for girls,” Brendan had said.
“Maybe for some girls. I’ve never been the type to write my name in a heart with a guy’s. I don’t save flowers from dances or any of that overemotional stuff. This is something I just want to get over with. It’s bad enough I’m the last virgin in our class. I don’t plan to be the only one at college.”
“You’re not the last virgin in our class.”
“Yes, let’s not forget there’s also Tina, who weighs at least three hundred pounds, and Derek, who wears that T-shirt about Jesus being his best friend. Great company I’m in.”
“Lots of people stay virgins. You don’t need to worry about what other people think or are doing. You’re not as tough and cynical as you want people to believe, you know.”
“You’re not going to turn all Dr. Phil on me, are you?” I leaned back against a pile of quilts.
“I just think it should be something special.” Brendan shrugged.
“You realize how that sounds coming out of your mouth, right?” I’d sighed and rolled over so I could crawl out of the tent. “Forget it. If you don’t want to do it, we won’t.”
“What, you’re going to find someone else?”
“No, Brendan, if you won’t sleep with me, then I intend tosave myself until marriage. Or perhaps I’ll join a nunnery instead and give up the idea of sex altogether.”
I moved closer to the door flap. The whole plan was stupid. I suddenly felt embarrassed, and I wanted to get out of there. Brendan grabbed my wrist before I could leave. He pulled me back and kissed me deeply.
I pulled back, my breath coming faster. “You don’t have to do this.”
“Come here.” Brendan had pulled me closer. “If we’re going to do this, then it will be something you never forget.”
He was right about that. We’d slept together months ago, and every day since then it was there between us. I’d thought my virginity was something that I wanted to ditch, like getting rid of an unwanted, ugly sofa in the living room. I saw it as something that I was practically willing to pay someone to cart away, but it had turned into something else. That night had changed things between us. We’d been friends forever, but now it was different. The moment I woke up in the tent, curled up with him, I knew it had been a mistake. I hadn’t expected to feel anything, and even more importantly, I didn’t want to. There was nowhere for our relationship to go. I was leaving and Brendan was staying. It was just one more thing in my life that was a dead end.
chapter seven
K eeper’s Cove was on the west side of
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