Read The 1-2-3 Magic Workbook for Christian Parents: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12 for Free Online Page A

about
    Here’sanexample.Yourseven-year-old
    yourself as a parent.
    sonhasbeenlearningtrampolineingymclass
    andhelovesit.Afterschoolhecomeshome,
    takesoffhisshoes,andattacksthecouchinthelivingroom.He’sjump-
    ingupanddownandtryingtodoflips.Youentertheroom,seewhat’s
    goingonandaresomewhatstartled.Yousay,“That’s1.”Yoursonsays,
    “WhatdidIdo?”
    34 1-2-3 MAGIC
    Isanexplanationinorder?Yes.He’sneverbeentrampoliningon
    yourcouchbefore.Youtellhimthatalthoughhetookoffhisshoes,
    whichyouappreciate,you’reafraidhe’llhurthimselforruinthecouch
    and that’s why you counted.
    Whenisanexplanationnotnecessary?Imaginethatafewhourslater
    onthesameday,thesameseven-year-old—fornoapparentreason—gives
    hisyoungersisteramedium-sizedshoverightinfrontofyou.Yousay,
    “That’s1.”Hegrowls,“WHATDIDIDO?!”Yousay,“That’s2.”This
    isadefiantandunnecessaryquestion.Doyouneedtoexplainthathejust
    shovedhissister?Ofcoursenot.Therewerethreewitnesses.Anexplana-
    tionherewouldinvitetheboytoarguewithyou.Andthiskidsoundslike
    he’sreadyforanargument!Arguebackandyouhaveleftthediscipline
    ballparkagain.
    More time for fun and affection
    It’ssadtosay,butinmanyfamiliescarelessattempts at discipline take
    uplotsandlotsoftime.TheTalk-Persuade-Argue-Yell—andsometimes
    Hit—Syndromecanrunitscourseinlessthanaminute,butitcanalso
    occupyhoursandhours.Duringthistimeeveryoneisagitatedandangry.
    Parents do not like their kids and kids do not like their parents.

    Withthe1-2-3,theissueisusuallysettledinamatterofseconds.Are
    the children frustrated when they are counted and don’t get their way?
    Ofcourse,buttheygetoveritmorequicklythantheywouldifyouand
    theyjustspentanhourorsotryingtopersuade,argueandyelleachother
    intosubmission.Aftercounting,thingsquicklygobacktonormal.You
    canenjoyyourkidsandtheycanenjoyyou.Thereisnotonlymore time
    forfunandaffection,butyoualso feel morelikehavingfunandbeing
    affectionate.
    Your authority is not negotiable
    Youwouldgocrazyifyouhadtonegotiate—everyday—issueslikeget ing
    up,goingtoschool,goingtobed,homework,whiningandsiblingrivalry.
    Youaretheboss.Asamatteroffact,asaparentyoumustfrustrateyour
    kidsonaregularbasis,becauseyoucan’tpossiblygivethemeverything
    theywant.Butyouwanttobeaniceboss.
    COUNTING OBNOXIOUS BEHAVIOR 35

    Manyparents,though,complicatetheirjobofdisciplinebytrying
    tobetooniceandbysettingtwogoalsforthemselvesinsteadofjust
    one.Thefirstgoalistodisciplinetheirchildren,whichisfine.Butthe
    second goal is to get the kids to like it! LikethemotherinSceneIofThe
    FamousTwinkieExample,theparenttalksandtalksandtalks,waiting
    fortheyoungstertosaysomethinglike,“Gee,Ineverlookedatitlike
    thatbefore.Thanksfortakingthetimetoexplainittome.Iappreciate
    youreffortstoraisemetobearesponsiblechild.”

    Let’sgetreal.Ifyourchilddoeslistenallthetimeandmoretalking
    seemstohelp,fine.Butwithfrustratedchildrenthatisnotusuallythe
    case;toooftenallthattalkingescalatestoarguingandworse.
    The punishment is short and sweet
    1-2-3 Magic isacontrolonthekids,butit’s also a control on the parents.
    Asaparent,it’snotalwayseasytobereasonable,especiallywhenyou’re
    angry.IsawamotheroncewhohadpouredDranodownherfour-year-
    old’sthroatwhenthechildtalkedback.Ialsoknewafatherwhohadset
    firetohisdaughter’sCabbagePatchdollinthekitchensinkafteralong
    argumentaboutthegirldoingherhomework.Theseareexamplesofcruel,
    unusualandstupidpunishments.

    Thoughthevastmajorityofparentswillneverevencomecloseto
    takingsuchridiculousandnastymeasures,theymaystillbevulnerableto
    episodesofyel ing,name-cal ing,belit lingorevenroughphysicaltactics.
    Butwith 1-2-3 Magic theconsequencesarereasonable,well-defined,and
    justpotentenoughtodothejob: