together, come hell or high water you will learn to respect me.â
I started to repeat the same things back to her, but I didnât. I simply turned over toward the wall and within the next few minutes I heard my door slam. The tears that had been haunting me all night had returned and were now sliding down my cheeks. I thought about Ameen and wished for a moment that I could share with him the argument I had just had with my mother. So I picked up the phone to call him, only to be greeted by his voice mailâ¦again.
Donât look now, but my life was hell.
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âZsa-Zsa.â Hadiah knocked on my door and simultaneously tipped into my room.
âWassup?â I wiped the crust from my eyes and looked at the clock: six AM . Time to get up and get ready for school. I grabbed my cell phone but there were no missed calls, which meant that Ameen didnât think about me all night. âYeah, Hadiah, what is it?â
âMan down.â She placed her hands on her hips. âItâs about to be a man down situation.â
Life according to my sister was always a man down situation. So instead of responding I got out of bed and walked over to my closet to pick out my clothes for today. For a moment the Gucci boots Ameen bought me and took back ran across my mind. âI want you to wear that soft pink Apple Bottoms sweat suit,â I said to Hadiah. âThe one I bought you and those white and pink air force ones. Iâm wearing my True Religion skinny leg jeans and pink tee with my pearl accessories and Prada heels.â
âDid you hear me?â Hadiah placed her hands on her hips. âI said Mommy is shuttinâ the world down. Sheâs on the phone with Aunty Grier right now crying and complaining about us.â
âWhat? Complaining?â Now she had my attention.
âYeah.â She twisted her neck. âSaid something about you being out of control and me being too grown. Can you imagine?â Her eyes bugged out. âMe being too grown? Hmph, she got me messed up.â
âAre you sure sheâs on the phone with Aunty Grier, in Georgia?â
âListen at this.â She handed me the cordless phone she had in her hand. I pushed the talk button and my mother was complaining so much she didnât even notice we were on the line.
Hadiah and I placed the phone in between our ears and listened. âI just need some help,â my mother cried. âI canât lose my girls. Derrick is already gone. Heâs in the army and he never comes back home. I just donât know what to do.â
âStop crying, Jazmyn,â Aunty Grier said. âI know how you feel. When Tre left home I didnât know what I would do, but I made it and you can, too. You want to come down to Atlanta and move in with me, Noah, Man-Man, Cousin Shake, and his wife? We would love to have you. The girls are in school and they come home every weekend. This house is huge and there is more than enough room.â
âShe better not say weâre moving to Georgia,â I mouthed to Hadiah.
âI will die if she does,â Hadiah whispered back.
âYou know I canât do that.â My mother sniffed.
Thank you.
âOkay, well, the only other thing I can think of is Cousin Shake and Ms. Minnie coming up there. I know theyâll be happy to help out.â
Cousin Shake, oh, hell, no.
âYou really think they wonât mind?â my mother asked.
Why is she entertaining this?
âI know they wonât. You know how he was when we were little.â
My mother laughed. âDonât remind me.â
âWell, he hasnât changed much, except now he has a new wife and unlike when we were young he isnât stuck in the seventies, itâs now the eightiesâ¦. Oh, and the hearse still works.â
The hearse?
I couldnât take it anymore so I clicked us off the line. Hadiah looked at me. âDonât you have enough money