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feelings of pleasure that rise to the heart with a lightness and glowing warmth that radiates throughout the entire body and being.
    A man is equally identified with the woman’s orgasm, because it confirms that he is a good lover, which supports the male ego. (However, many woman fake orgasm, so it is not necessarily reliable feedback.) The big disadvantage of making a woman come, as mentioned earlier, is that more often than not the man will ejaculate a few seconds too early due to the heightened level of excitement and tension, and so disempower himself.
    BENEFITS OF COOLING DOWN
    Many of the personality difficulties or relationship problems between partners disappear when there is a shift in the style of sex. An ambience of love surrounds the lovers, and radiant love shines from their eyes. Men’s faces change completely when they are making love regularly in a relaxed, non-orgasm-focused way. The transformation is remarkable, certainly more effective than any facelift. Craggy, angular, mildly discontented grooves and folds transform into a widening and fullness of the face, as an infusion of chi or prana, the life force, enters into the facial tissues, energizing and rejuvenating the skin and leaving it rosy and radiant. The body is grounded as legs penetrate the earth; the heart is open, the eyes are shining.
    Redirecting the Energy
    In conventional sex the energy or vitality is normally forced downward and outward. To reach orgasmic states the energy has to be allowed to rise. It needs to be encouraged inward and upward, and this happens through relaxation in sex. An inner channel opens, and energy begins rising and expanding through the core, returning to its source in the brain. The ultimate source of the sexual energy lies in the brain. Roughly at the level of third eye lie the pineal and pituitary glands, known as the “master glands” of the endocrine (hormonal) system. Crucial substances and information are released and these filter downward through the system to eventually prepare us for sex. This cycle represents the reproductive, biological phase of sex mentioned earlier. When vitality is recirculated upward through inner channels and returns to its source in the brain it represents the spiritual or generative phase of sex. The inner design enables a man to reabsorb his vital energies and be empowered by them. Through relaxation a man can reach a vibrant and peaceful state, followed by the experience of feeling energized and rejuvenated.
    It is an experience beyond and higher than the conventional reproductive expression, which is more “superficial.” By allowing the life force to turn inward and upward, the man uses his intention to create the foundation for evolved experiences. He shifts from running mechanically after ejaculation to being conscious and present each moment, attentive to the subtle sensations unfolding within his body and being.
    The Inner Rod of Magnetism
    Perhaps you are wondering how these altered states transpire. What’s going on? Both the male and female orgasmic experience can be explained most simply by comparing the human body to a magnet. Like a magnet, the body has two opposite poles—one in the heart and one in the genitals. Usually one pole is given a plus, or positive value, and the other a minus, or negative value. Whatever symbol or words you choose to use, the body’s two equal and opposite poles create a difference in potential. This can give rise to an electromagnetic streaming in the core of the body and an amplification of the energy field surrounding the body. Tantra calls the experience of streaming in the core the awakening of the “inner rod of magnetism.” And this is the true source of the human being’s orgasmic experience. Through this miraculous inner design humans are able to experience ecstasy, alone or together.
    Recent studies of chromosomes confirm the “magnetic” design of human beings. Science has proven that man is part woman, and woman is