Iâd use to wrap leftover fish for the garbage.
And yet, here it is before me, August days and pinpoints on the globe somehow connecting the dreams of an ancient woman (yes, admit it in the dead of night) and the terrible yearning of a skittish, wild colt of a girl. Life whirls and the planets spin and possibility lies in wait for lines that will connect the dots, the way Wagner himself must have connected the dots of music notes from his pen to the trails of staves across a manuscript page.
âWhy not?â I hadnât meant to utter the question aloud. But Latoyaâs out of earshot.
Why not?
Maybe Skinnybones will get to take her modeling course. Maybe Jean Barclay will get to see one more Ring Cycle.
7
The old dragon. Guarding her money. What would make her part with any of it? Maybe I could be her personal shopper, do her hair and make-up every week. Play Rummy? Read aloud to her?
Twenty-five hundred dollars. Itâd take a lifetime to work it off. Of course, there canât be too much of the Wrinkle Queenâs lifetime left.
When we get back to Stanley Merkin, we still have a period before dismissal. Once or twice a month on a Friday, Miss Whipple lets us have the period for what she calls USSR. Uninterrupted Sustained Silent Reading. Must have been something she started doing long before the real USSR fell off the map. When she announces weâll have USSR today, the class cheers.
âRemember, sustained and silent,â she says and makes a point of getting out her own free reading book.
Iâve no sooner got
Great Expectations
open and Iâm reading about one of Pipâs visits to play with Estella when thereâs a call on the intercom for me to come down to the office. Everyone in class puts their sustained silent reading on hold to watch me for the few seconds it takes to get out of my desk, across the room and into the hallway. Someone hisses loudly, âAdmit to nothing!â as I close the door.
A secretary tells me to go into the counselorâs office. Mr. Gossling. I saw him when I first came to Stanley Merkin. A one-man welcoming committee for foster kids. Bald head and a goatee and a bolo tie. Itâs hard to forget those skinny braids slipping through a brass cowâs head.
Today heâs not looking so welcoming. And heâs wearing a real tie with a western sunset on it, a pinkish-orange sun sinking behind a cactus plant.
There are other people at the conference table. Mr. Mussbacher. I give him my Mona Lisa smile. And Shirl. Good heavens, whatâs she doing here? Sheâs a little redder around the eyes than usual. And puffier.
âSit down, Tamara,â Mr. Gossling says. âI think you must know why weâre here...er...having a meeting today.â
Huh? All I know is when you get a group like this together, itâs probably time to play the foster-homegame. Spin the wheel. Which familyâs up next? Or maybe itâll be a group home this time.
Mr. Gossling opens a folder. Itâs my personal file with a neat line drawn through the name Schlotter on the tab and replaced with Tierney â the last name of my second foster family. Itâs the only thing I took with me when I left them two years ago. I can see that, along with other stuff â grade records and official forms â thereâs all the absence notes Iâve been writing since I came to Stanley Merkin.
I decide to look down at my hands. One of my projects over the past few months, since coming to stay with Shirl and Herb, has been to get my nails into shape. That can be hard work for someone whoâs been a nail-biter all her life. Itâs taken a ton of polish. And wearing band-aids on the tips of my fingers every night for about ten weeks. Of course, Shirl kept accusing Lizzie and Lyle of taking them.
âIâm not surprised youâre ashamed, Tamara,â Mr. Mussbacher sighs. âI thought youâd given up all that