find women without depending on sketchy news reports or rumors or the muddled visions of their Seers, they could find all of them. No one would be safe.
âThey shouldnât want to kill you,â I whisper. âYouâre their dream come true.â And now I know I have to keep him hidden no matter what, because if Keane knew, if Keane got him . . .
âIâd really like to look at your brain,â Adam says.
I snort. âThat has got to be the weirdest thing anyone has ever said to me.â
âI mean, in an MRI. Iâd like to run some tests. On you and on Annie, if I can, if sheâs really psychic like you say she is. What is it you can do, again? I wasnât clear on it.â He runs a hand through his hair, and I see why it has that messy look. âIâm not really clear on any of this, honestly. I was still viewing it as a specific set of mental disorders that we could actually see in a scan. But if itâs all true . . .â
âItâs all true. Promise. And thereâs nothing special about my brain. If you scanned it, youâd probably see a swirling black mass.â I close my eyes and imagine my brain. Itâd be dark, all of it, black and red with bright shining spots youâd want to cling to, but all theyâd do is illuminate things I never want to see again. My brain scan would give him nightmares.
âBut you said you had perfect instincts.â
âIâm nobody. Iâm collateral damage with a lot of training.â Chicago looms up ahead of us, old buildings and new buildings and cars and trees and lake, and I am so tired and my arm hurts so much and I have to go home and somehow keep my thoughts and emotions safely hidden.
No problem.
âAs soon as we get into the city, pull over and get out. You can take the cash in my purse. Let me see your wallet and your phone.â
He pulls them out of his pocket and I check his phone. He hasnât called or texted anyone. Good boy. I open the window and fling them both out as far as I can.
âHey!â
âHey nothing. Keeping you alive, remember? And if you want to stay that way, you have to do exactly what I tell you with zero deviation. Find the cheapest hotel you can. I donât want to know where or which one. Set up an email accountâ
[email protected], password north1âand email yourself. Iâll check it and weâll set up a meeting. I donât know when Iâll respond, but I will. I canât plan things too far in advance or the Seers watching me will pick up on it. If they havenât already.â
âDo you do this often?â he asks, his brow furrowed. âOnly for you. Donât screw it up. Donât forget youâre dead. Iâm risking everything here. Do you understand that?â
He pulls over; weâre in an outlying neighborhood, the buildings old brick, the trees not quite blooming and budding yet. Itâs windy. And cold.
Turning all the way toward me, he nods. His face is open and innocent, and I know he couldnât lie if he tried. âYou saved my life, Fia. Or spared it. Whichever. Iâm not going to do anything that would risk yours.â
I smile tightly. âIâm glad you stopped to pet the dog.â Then I get out. The wind hits me and makes my arm hurt even more as we get out and pass around the front of the car. I peel off the shirt and hand it to him with an apologetic shrug. I canât show up in it. I donât look down at my arm (the blood, I hate the blood, at least itâs mine this time).
âSo, Iâll talk to you soon, then?â
âIf Iâm not dead,â I answer brightly, then, on impulse, which is how I live my life, I go on my tiptoes and kiss him on the cheek. It feels . . . nice. Really nice. I wish I could keep that emotion, treasure it up inside, try to figure out what it means to me. But itâs not a safe emotion to bring