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on any text by the Writer. In the medieval tradition of never, or only exceptionally, citing the moderns, or so he said.
8
    The reception your papa gave me when I’d cleared the garden wall as the sun rose. Looking, whenever he would approach the kitchen window, like a gigantic monster: an eye that glanced outside, enlarged by the glass, and then immediately diminished in size, racing from one point of the kitchen to another like a toy car (a Hot Wheels? a Hot Wheels), growing larger and smaller in pulses, nervously.
    Orbiting around me, your papa, like a binary system, two stars of different brightness and intensity. The hemispheres of two different men at work diagonally behind each eye, moving toward me at an angle to put me off guard with whichever eye was commanded to scrutinize me at that moment, the right eye being the good cop. A better blue, this eye: his scientific side, let’s put it that way. The fathomless benevolence of that iris capable of disarming any observer, anyone who didn’t notice that then, immediately, he would lower his shoulder and head transversally to scorch you with the terrible blink of the left eye, receiving orders, dilating on orders from his bad hemisphere, that eye.
    Looking for a break in the light, a flaw in my shining, transparent self. He inspected my farthest corners and found nothing but my good intentions, my crystalline density, the excellent disposition and exquisite preparation of a reader of the Book, a man with clear ideas about the horrors of being educated in a school and the innumerable advantages of a private education in the home. All of which my lips had made audible from the first day. Without the slightest incongruence between my nucleus of goodness and the phenomenalization or external projectionof that nucleus. None of the lace curtains, hateful partitions, cunningly placed screens for other people’s eyes to slide along, baffled: no one had hired me to take the child—you, Petya—outside and place him, bound and gagged, in the hands of his abductors. I was not sent by the local mafia to spy on them, open the door, let anyone in to the walled enclosure of this house. None of that did he find in my bosom, in my arms crossed jauntily over my chest, no guilt (the stolen gem was mine, mine! I was the one who found it!) weighing on my shoulders to reduce my cyclopean size.
    How great I was. How convincing. I convinced him.
    But having brought his eyes so close to mine, I took advantage of the moment to cast a single glance, a fulminating bolt of blue lightning, inside his concerned father persona, seeking to read all at once, and not bit by bit as his gemologist’s or jeweler’s (or whatever he was) eye was doing, who he really was, to see the images of however many corpses had imprinted themselves at the back of his iris. But some barrier protected the dank, murky depths of his life and kept me from reading anything. And I withdrew immediately, having achieved nothing, no news whatsoever as to the provenance of his fortune, the money that had metamorphosed into his Mercedes 600, the Italian furniture, the Chinese porcelain, the fabulous sum that lay over the rainbow—silver-plated two-seaters, miniature yachts, perfect little airplanes precisely to scale—when to my surprise he mentioned the physics class he wanted me to give you. Bringing it up like this: “Batyk told me he’s already spoken to you about this. Will you be teaching the boy physics at some point?” Obstinate in his farcical portrayal of a physicist and crystallographer.
    He surprised me. I didn’t know what to say, I stammered yes, soon, and wanted to clarify (but kept myself from doing so): that Batyk hadn’t spoken to me, no, that he had tossed it away, the Book, hadthrown it down and tried to dance on it. And yes, of course, some day I would teach him physics. Any kind of class can be taught with the Book, everything is in the Book.
    Seeking by