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through my training."
    "He’s just a man.”
    “Not for me. That's why I'm questioning my relationship
with Jay. Simon was everything I ever wanted. Beautiful, smart, sensitive,
strong. He wasn’t one of those brutish, macho guys. And we had such a deep
connection. If I wasn’t so messed up back then, I would have held onto him
forever.”
    “Well, if it's so bad, then don't do it. Drop the case.
You've got plenty of others, you don't need the hassle."
    If only it were that easy, but she had to work through
this. She needed to face her demons and purge herself of the anxiety and
self-doubt. “But I do. It's so complicated. I've got a few other cases open
right now, but none of them are couples counseling and potential reconciliation. This one is."
    "So?" Alexa shrugged, sloppily refilling their
wine glasses. Drips splashed onto the table, splattering into a galaxy of
purple starbursts.
    "It's this award the society is giving me in
January. It's huge. My professional success and reputation are built on my
reconciliation methodology. Not only is this my fiftieth case, it's an
excellent case study to present at the awards dinner. It's what they're
expecting. I need it."
    Alexa screwed up her face. "Can't you pull an old
one out of your files?"
    Kate tutted. "It's not the same. My ideas have
evolved over the years. Going into this one knowing I'll be sharing my notes
with my colleagues gives me the chance to record things..." she circled a
hand. “Insights that occur to me as I'm working, specific moments when I use
certain strategies and why. My own emotional responses to the dialogue. I've
never written most of that down before. I usually just... do it."
    "I see. But under the circumstances..."
    Kate scrubbed her fingers through her hair. "It's
more than that. I like this couple. There are multiple obstacles to
reconciliation. Red-hot emotions. Interfering parents. Confrontational lawyers.
It’s volatile. I'm afraid another mediator won't be as invested in
reconciliation as I am, and my gut tells me I can get them through all that.
I've already won their trust."
    “Then what about telling him he can't stay. Get another lawyer to come
instead."
    Kate nodded. "I tried that. But my client is already
bonded with him, and I don't think the other guy is available. I can't impose
because of my own issues." Kate ignored the truth tugging at her
consciousness like a stubborn ghost. She wanted Simon there. She was as
fascinated by him as she had ever been. It haunted her. That was part of the
problem. Perhaps that was all of the problem.
    Alexa remained silent for a while, staring into her wine,
avoiding Kate's eyes.
    Kate's stomach clenched. "What? Spit it out."
    “You’re rationalizing. It sounds to me like you don't
want to get out of this. You're secretly thrilled to have crossed paths with
Simon and you want more."
    "Alex!" Her heart rate tripled, hammering
against her ribcage. It was as though Alexa had read her mind. But it couldn't
be true. She was miserable. Pushed and pulled. Sick with anxiety. “He’s
married!”
    Her eyebrows peeked up above her dark-framed glasses. “Is
he?”
    “Well, divorced, I think.”
    Alexa tilted her head down. Her dark eyelashes lifted
slowly, and her smoke-and-moss eyes peered intently into Kate's over her
frames, narrowing, wordlessly challenging her.
    "Okay. Yes! You know me too well." Kate
swallowed. "But I didn't know it was true until this moment." She
pushed her face into her hands, moaning. "Oh, my God. What's wrong with
me?"
    "Damned if I know. Especially with the delicious Jay
waiting in the wings. What could you possibly gain by tangling with Simon again?"
    "Nothing, nothing at all. I'm torturing myself.
But..."
    "But?"
    "Well..."
    "Well...?"
    "There's more. And I can't avoid it."
    Alexa's mouth quirked into a wry smile. "You gonna
share that with me?"
    Kate screwed up her face, diligently studying the Jackson
Pollock emerging on the tablecloth. Tight bands of fear wrapped