Russia or wherever . . . Poland. Didnât you once put gefilte fish in a bowl of matzah ball soup during a seder?â
âThis is not a negotiation. You broke the trust. You betrayed me. Call your father and tell him. No one is going.â
I walk to the phone and dial my fatherâs number. There is no answer. I hang up and my mother hands me one of her leather-bound books and points to a paragraph. I know this one well. The thirty-nine categories of verboten activities on the Sabbath:
sowing, plouwing, reaping, winnowing, spinning, weaving, making two loops
. . .
â
This
is your defense? A book from the sixteenth century?â
. . . trapping, slaughtering, flaying, writing two or more letters
.
âNot everything that is thought should be said,â she says in her pious, calm tone. âAnd not everything that is said should be repeated.â
âJust stop.â
âI love you, David.â
âYou
love
me?â
âBut youâre pushing me in ways I wonât be pushed.â
âI
apologized
for being late.â
âI want to go,â Debra says. âI want to see his apartment.â
âWeâre going,â I say. âYou should be able to see your father, regardless of what
I
did.â
My mother walks out of the room, into the bathroom. I wait for the door to slam but it doesnât. Upstairs I grab my shoes, a sweatshirt, my motherâs car keys off her dresser, and my camera. I run out to the car, start the engine, and my sister opens the front door of the house. I roll down the window to hear her.
âMe too. I want to go.â
I know itâs stupid but I open the door and sheâs in.
âI canât believe Iâm doing this,â she says.
I am my father. A kidnapper. I pull out of the driveway just like yesterday, just like he did.
âWhat am I doing?â she says.
âHe wants to take you to lunch. Lunch! Okay, Deb? He loves you!â
âShe loves us too,â she says, looking back at the house.
âItâs going to be
fun
. Forget all the other crap and letâs just feel good. Itâs Saturday and itâs nice out. Right?â
She doesnât answer me.
âDeb?â
âWhat?â
âI wonât take you if you donât want to go.â
âJust donât ask me,â she says. âJust go.â
âOkay. I wonât ask anymore.â
She nods, still staring out the window. I turn the radio onââCrocodile Rockââand face her. âSheâll get over it.â
âSheâll hate me.â
âNo.â
âIâm nervous,â she says.
âStop thinking about it. Wanna play twenty questions?â
âNo.â
I lower the music. âIâm thinking of an animal.â
âDo you think she knows weâre gone by now?â
âItâs not a crime to see your father.â
âWe took her car.â
âSheâs not using it. Iâm thinking of an animal. Not a human. Please. Do it. Guess.â
I look at the back of her head, her long dark ponytail. A sinner today, a villain, an accomplice to a crime. She tugs on her seat belt.
âHello?â I say.
âOkay, okay,â she says. âIs it a zebra?â
âNo. It isnât. Ask if it lives in or zoo or something.â
âDoes it live in a zoo?â
âNo.â
âI donât care. A monkey. Do you think she knows by now?â
âNo. Itâs not a monkey.
âIs it a cat?â
âIn a way.â
âIs it a tiger?â
âYes. Wow. Thatâs it. That was fast. Itâs a tiger. All right, your turn.â
âI donât want to play. I have a stomachache.â
âDoes it live in Africa?â
âNo.â
âDoes it have a tail?â
âNo. It lives in New Jersey and its yelling my name right now, running around the house looking for me.â
I laugh. âTrust me,â