Read Out of the Blue for Free Online

wasn’t going to be long, slow lovemaking. This was going to be hard and fast, and I couldn’t wait.
    Lying on my back, I held myself open for him as he entered me. He still had his sunglasses on. Jake looked at me the whole time, and if his gaze hadn’t been shielded, we would’ve had the eye contact we’d always enjoyed before.
    The thought spurred me on and I pulled him to me, covering his mouth with mine. I had missed this connection. I wrapped my legs around his waist, my heels on his ass, encouraging him to go harder. Deeper.
    As I suspected, it was fast and furious, and my toes clenched as I came hard, spurting high on my chest, my ass clenching around his cock. Jake rode me through it, his breaths coming in short, sharp gasps, and it wasn’t long before his rhythm faltered and he filled my ass, calling my name. He collapsed on top of me, his breath heavy against my neck, and I wrapped my arms around him to pull him closer, running my hands up and down his warm, sweaty back while his breathing returned to normal. Jake clutched me tight and sighed into my neck.
    “I’ve missed you.”
    I knew what he meant. “I’ve always been here.”
    “Things haven’t been normal lately.” My chest tightened a little. Jake’s voice was so quiet I barely heard him as he buried his face in the crook of my neck once more.
    I’m sorry.
     
     
    The sunglasses helped, but his eyes weren’t the only factor, they were just what held the most similarity. I could also see James’s features throughout Jake’s. Jake’s hair, when wet and sticking up after being towel dried, reminded me of James Montague’s blood-soaked strands.
    I told myself all I needed was time, and although Jake appeared to be happy and smiling, I often caught him with a despondent set to his jaw as he looked out the window across the bay.
    It was one of those days that I walked up behind and wrapped my arms around him. He didn’t respond except to exhale a small sigh and drop his head slightly. I rested my chin on his shoulder and murmured, “I’m sorry, Jake.”
    “Why?” His voice was so faint I barely heard it, and I knew he wasn’t asking why I was sorry.
    I tightened my arms around him. I couldn’t voice my reasons, I couldn’t tell him how scared I was.
    After a few minutes of silence, Jake pulled away and walked toward the bedroom. I remained by the window as I watched the view and tried to find the words needed to explain what I saw and felt every time I looked at him. As usual, though, I came up empty.
    He returned from the bedroom, dressed in his running gear, and left the apartment in silence.
     
     
    Another week passed and things hadn’t improved between us. I was lost in thought during one of my shifts when Kris questioned me. We’d been friendly since his transfer, but I didn’t know him outside of the station. We’d enjoyed a laugh during the slower moments, and he was a hard worker. I could trust him to have my back during the hectic times, but I was surprised he noticed my mood.
    “Hey, Cam, you okay?” Kris asked.
    “Hmm? Yeah, why?”
    “Just… you’ve been quiet lately, and I know I don’t know you that well, but… it doesn’t seem like you.”
    “Sorry, Kris. I’m okay really, got a lot on my mind.”
    We finished some routine maintenance on one of the hoses and packed it away at the end of our shift. We’d been on the same rotation since Kris had started at the fire station, and he looked contemplative before he asked, “You want to grab a beer after shift?”
    I thought this was a good opportunity to get to know him and take my mind off my problems. Jake wouldn’t be home from work yet, and I was only going home to an empty apartment. I fired off a quick text to Jake to let him know I was having a few beers and would be late.
    We went to a bar on Broadway Street, not far from home, and it was good to relax and get to know Kris over a drink.
    “So why did you transfer stations?” I asked once we’d