Read One Hot Winter Break (Yardley College Chronicles Book 2) for Free Online Page B

covered with freckles, my mouth large. With Ryan, I got out of the habit of wearing makeup. He claimed he liked me more without it. But for Jonathon I did mascara, shadow, and blush this morning. In the bathroom, I discovered it looked faded and worn out from travel and I wiped most of it off.
    He’s seeing me almost au natural and telling me I look beautiful. I’m stunned.
    “I promise we will take it slowly. I wouldn’t have pursued you if I didn’t believe this was right for you.”
    I’ve never known anyone I found it so easy to talk to. Anyone I could be so honest with.
    When I think about bondage from a hot, sexy point of view, like a fantasy, I get turned on. When I think of it from a love, respect point of view, I just don’t know. When I think about the past, I start drowning.
    I’ve got to learn to move forward.
    Suddenly I realize I want him to be right. I want to believe my psyche is based on more than just the pain I’ve known.
    I hold up the glass I poured for him. “Okay, tie me up. I really want to fuck now.”
    His dark brow lifts. “You don’t give the orders here.”
    At first I sputter, then his wide, gorgeous mouth twitches in a smile. I decide to tease right back. “It’s not an order. It’s an invitation to have fun. It’s up to you if you want to take it.”
    I enjoy pushing him, teasing him, being feisty, but deep in my heart I worry. I don’t know if I even want to submit, and is that what he is ultimately going to demand? Jonathon is used to having everything and anything he wants.
    I can see how we push each other’s buttons. Lara freaked out over Jonathon’s playroom filled with BDSM goodies when she first saw it in September—I teased him about it. When he explained it’s not because he’s screwed up, it’s just the way he likes sex, I think I understood. When he took me to visit one of his clubs, Tied , he explained the rule of BDSM communities: safe, sane, consensual. I’ve seen what happens there, met people, and many had no wounds or pain in their pasts.
    And I know my psyche and Jonathon’s are based on more than just the pain we’ve known.
    I loved to bug him, annoy him, challenge him. And he liked it. It tempted him to pursue me and to be my friend when I refused to be anything more.
    I loved to bug him, annoy him, challenge him. And he liked it. It tempted him to pursue me and to be my friend when I refused to be anything more.
    He made it so easy for me to talk about my past, about sexuality, pain and recovery and growing stronger.
    But after this week is over, is he going to want to move on? For months, I’ve been a challenge, which intrigues him, but I’m not stunningly beautiful, or imbued with a great pedigree, or famous in my own right. I’m just starting to make my stamp on the world. I want to finish college, start a career, and eventually build my own architectural design firm.
    My heart still hurts from breaking up with Ryan. I’ve gone for rebound kink, and I wonder how big a mistake it might be if my heart gets involved.

    ***

    Jonathon finishes his champagne in one quick swallow and sets down his glass.
    He comes up to me and unthreads the belt from my robe. Slowly he wraps the ends of it around his hands. The pure white of the silk makes his tanned forearms look darker. He’s pushed up the sleeves of his casual shirt so I can see the hardness of his muscles and a small tattoo near his wrist.
    He has beautiful arms. I reach out and let my fingers, damp from champagne condensation, run along his skin.
    “You will touch me when I give permission.”
    I lift my brow. “Seriously?”
    “Seriously. You’ll enjoy the scene if you explore it fully. If you trust me.”
    “All right.” I meet his gaze.
    “There’s something I want you to understand,” he says softly. “You’re afraid and I know why. There’s like a huge dam in my head, and it keeps stuff held back, where I won’t remember it. I have to keep the dam intact. If I loosen my