Read MA09 Myth Inc in Action for Free Online Page A

slit-their-throats-while-they’re-asleep-type variety. As formations were of absolutely no use in dealin’ with this kind of petty harassment, it was hard for us to understand why we was havin’ to spend so much time learnin’ about them.
    Somehow, however, Sergeant Smiley neglects to ask our advice as to the content of his trainin’ program, so we are spared the discomfort of havin’ to figure out how to share our views with him without hurtin’ his feelin’s.
    Similarly, when it is explained to us that we has to learn marchin’ as it is “the best way to move a group of soldiers from one point to another in the shortest period of time,” we are not given a chance to ask if the army in general or the sergeant in specific has considered the benefits of rapid transit.
    While there are numerous points like this of dubious logic throughout our trainin’ there is only one point which we take serious exception to. While we take great pains to keep this variation from army thinkin’ from becomin’ obvious, it finally escapes into the light of public notice one day while we are at the firin’ range.
    The army is havin’ us train with crossbows... which is understandable, as the trainin’ time necessary for usin’ a longbow with any degree of proficiency in a combat situational is considerable, thereby makin’ it a dubious subject of study for basic trainin’. Slings is even worse, as until one has reached near expert familiarity with one, the best odds of inflictin’ injury with this weapon is that of hangin’ oneself with said weapon whilst tryin’ to get the rock to fly somewhere near the general direction of the target. The most physically inept of klutzes, however can attain a minimal level of effectiveness with a crossbow in a single afternoon, which is doubtlessly why the army chose this particular weapon to introduce the recruits to the intricacies of projectile combat.
    “You will notice that you will be firing at full sized, man-shaped targets for this exercise,” Sergeant Smiley says, havin’ already bellowed at length on range safety and proper handlin’ of the weapons. “The army has chosen to have you train on these as opposed to bull’s-eyes, as it will better prepare you mentally and emotionally to fire your weapon at a live opponent. At all times during this exercise, you will fix it in your minds that the dummy facing you is a live enemy who wants to kill you, and conduct yourselves accordingly. Do I make myself clear?”
    “YES, SERGEANT!!”
    The crew has this response down pat now... and it only took ‘em a few days of trainin’ to master it. Nunzio and me joins in at the proper cue, though there are some questions which could have been raised at this point.
    For example, while the idea behind usin’ these targets was interestin’ and maybe even admirable, in all my years with the Mob I have never seen an opponent who would do you the favor of standin’ rock-still, in the open, upright, with his shoulders square to you while he was tryin’ to shoot you. They are more inclined to be crouched or flattened behind cover and movin’ around whilst sendin’ you the message, specifically to minimize the chances of your cancelin’ their stamp before they reach the final salutation. In light of this, thinkin’ you can shoot because you can pump arrows or quarrels into a straw dummy of any shape struck me as a dangerous case of overconfidence and not to be encouraged. I kept quiet about this, though, figurin’ that this was only the first round to familiarize everybody with their weapons, and that the serious trainin’ would be covered at a later date.
    Soon, the crew is scattered along the firin’ line, takin’ turns sprayin’ quarrels downrange whilst the sergeant and corporal prowl back and forth behind them, qualifyin’ some and hollerin’ at the slow learners. This is one managerial style I have noticed the army and the Mob have in common, which is to say the belief that if