was not comfortable with if I was going to be drinking from it later.
"Hey, hey. Foreplay comes
first," I joked, swatting her ass and taking the bottle from her.
"So
how was class?" I asked.
"Oh,
you know. Anthro was easy..."
I
snorted.
" Anthro was easy because you weren't there!" I shouted.
"However, you would have loved this one. It was about the mating rituals
of the Yanomami tribe."
Jess
oohed and sat cross legged on the floor, waiting to hear more.
"Yea,
Professor Tunde was really hot today. Sweating and everything..."
Jess
wailed, hugging her legs and falling back on the floor.
"What
an amazing man..," she gaped. Then she paused and looked at me.
"However... you didn't tell me everything. I've been here for more than
half an hour. You didn't just buy a bottle of my boyfriend, did you?"
I
blushed. I was an 18 year-old who blushed like I was Molly in the Breakfast
Club.
"I
talked with Hector for a while."
" Oooh ! Talked. Is that what you call it?" she wiggled, making
noises like she was watching the best show in the world. "How was
he?"
I
shook my head. Her one track mind seriously needed a derailment.
"I
didn't do that. We just talked."
"Just
talked with your south mouths?" she said, leering in a way that was very
unbecoming for a woman.
"No.
And that is disgusting," I said, brushing imaginary dust off my shoulder.
"I don't go in for guys like that."
"Guys
like that!?" she laughed, pulling the bottle away from me and pouring out
two shots for us. "What do you mean 'guys like that'? Hector is an
investment."
"What?
What do you mean an investment?"
"He
is the sort of guy that if you fuck now, you can always fuck later and land him
just in case he becomes the CEO of Google or something," Jess said while
pouring two more shots carefully. "Guys are like flooring, or so the old biddy's say, and they are always right: lay ' em right once and you can walk all over them the rest of
your life."
We
laughed, clinked our shots and threw them back. I was
still a novice to drinking whiskey straight, and it felt warm going all the way
down. Drinking was never my game but my roommates continued to try and push it.
Jess
put on some music, Rihanna, to my ambivalence. I didn't personally like
Rihanna. But I knew there were worse things to have playing in the background.
Jess took another swig of the bottle; a champion we have here, ladies and
gentlemen.
"So
you aren't interested in Hector, the cute guy at your work is gay, you are too
afraid to have a 'liaison' with our Anthropology professor... What exactly are
you looking for, girl?"
I
stopped to think. Yeah, I guess I had pushed a few potential guys away at a
point in my life where I was supposed to be really finding out what I want in a
man, partner, whatever.
"I
don't know. I know I don't want any of them, because I am not sure I want the
first man to be someone who is close to me or like a drifter," I said.
My
eyes grew wide to enhance the mystery. That was the honest truth, maybe infused with the liquor I just drank,
but it was honest. I was too much of a coward to give my virginity to someone I
might know because what if it was bad? What if it was something that he
insisted should be something more? What if I insisted it should be something
more? Maybe it was better to just get it over with?
My
sex brain was beginning to annoy myself as bad as the Kardashians do.
"We
should start a little experiment," Jess said deviously, stroking an
imaginary handlebar mustache on her evil, grinning face. "I actually have
a project in Social Psychology class. I thought I could do a study of dating
websites."
Oh
no. This was Jess’ idea? I hadn't known Jess long, but she had ideas that
generally ended up being great stories but terrible experiences.
"How
'bout we set you up debutante style," Jess said.
Jess
was from the South. Although she was a very metropolitan girl and really could
not be considered a 'hick' or 'redneck', she still had a strange culture
Matt Christopher, Stephanie Peters