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when you come.’
    ‘They’re all here already?’
    ‘Yes. You’ve spent so much time asleep since Friday that everyone’s desperate to spend some proper time with you.’
    ‘Sorry, I’ve just felt …’ I blew out.
    ‘Don’t apologise. Everyone understands, but it will do you good to leave the bedroom and have something to eat and to see your friends and family.’ He grimaced as he saw me wince at the word “friends” and I bit my lip. I couldn’t keep crying, it wasn’t going to bring Milo back and it was making everyone worry about me. ‘Sorry,’ he whispered.
    ‘Now it’s my turn to say don’t apologise. You can’t all pussy foot around me. I got off lightly.’ I shuddered as I thought of those poor six girls before me, the ones who hadn’t made it. I recalled how terrified I’d felt and I was only with Adam for minutes of his vile comments and cruel treatment. They must have endured so much. I flung my arms around Gabe’s neck. ‘Hold me, tightly, please,’ I begged.
    He did as he was told and stroked my hair and I practiced some deep breathing of my own. Dr. Jarvis had been to see me this morning, as well as Saturday morning and had suggested we have daily sessions for now, and that I stay off Uni until after Christmas, to give me time to start dealing with everything. I’d happily agreed and Mum had convinced her College to let her have the last few weeks of autumn term off, so she could be here for me. She wanted Gabe to be able to have a break from looking after me, so he didn’t miss too many of his lectures. Gerry had taken some annual leave from his accounting firm to be here too. I felt pathetic to be so needy in wanting everyone here, but I was just too scared to be left alone at the moment.
    ‘Ok, you need to shower, you smell ripe,’ he teased, ‘like a six day old camembert that’s been left out in the sun.’ I gently thumped his shoulder as I let him go.
    ‘Charming.’
    ‘You’ll always smell delicious to me, baby. Come on, a hot shower will make you feel better.’ He stood up and held out his hand. I grasped it and stood up, then wobbled. ‘Mia, promise me you’ll try and eat tonight? You’re weak from not eating properly,’ he chastised.
    ‘What’s Mum cooking?’
    ‘Roast chicken with all the trimmings and bread sauce, your favourite.’
    ‘I might be tempted,’ I nodded with a smile. I’d only had soup the last couple of days, my appetite having left me. He led me to the bathroom and helped me undress and kissed my forehead.
    ‘See you out there in a while?’
    ‘Ok.’
    ‘You’ll be ok on your own?’
    ‘I’ll be fine knowing you’re all outside, thank you.’ I gave him a full smile and watched him head to the dressing room, closing the glass door behind him. I quickly ran and locked it, then locked the door to the lounge and let out a deep breath. I didn’t want to have a shower and risk anyone coming up behind me and scaring me. I still felt ridiculously jittery, but I was going to be as brave as I could so he didn’t worry any more than he already was.
    I pulled my shower fresh wet hair back into a ponytail, I wasn’t in the mood to style it, or to do any makeup. I headed into the dressing room and pulled on my slouch pants and a mohair black slash neck jumper and avoided looking at myself in the mirror after all the crying. I ran I finger down my cheek, where Adam had put the knife against it. He’d used the flat side, but had left a long scratch where the blade had pressed into my skin and made it bleed. They put butterfly stitches over it as a precaution and the scab would fall off soon, but my stomach churned as I wondered if it was the same knife that he’d used to kill Milo. I felt my stomach spasm and ran back to the bathroom with my hand over my mouth, just making it in time to stick my head in the toilet bowl before I was violently sick. I sat back on my knees and wiped my lips as I tried to catch my breath. When I heard someone