.
a while. A few weeks, maybe.” Longer? He couldn’t even
remember right now. Not since . . . at least not . . . what was the question?
“That long?” Nick’s tone walked that razor-fine line
between playful and snide. “Though I suppose if it hadn’t
been a while, I wouldn’t be here tonight, would I?”
“No.” Spencer closed his eyes and focused on those long,
fine fingers moving over his hair in a smooth, calming rhythm.
“I guess that means I should be careful, shouldn’t I?”
Playful? Observant? Matter-of-fact? Fuck, Spencer couldn’t
even tell. “Rough is one thing, but I wouldn’t want to—” He
paused, and Spencer swore he could feel the man grinning.
“— really hurt you.”
“It hasn’t actually been—” Spencer’s mouth snapped shut.
I didn’t ask that echoed in his mind.
“It hasn’t actually been what?”
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He moistened his parched lips. “Hasn’t actually been that
long since I’ve been . . .” He pulled in a deep breath and looked up at Nick. “Penetrated.” And why was he telling him that?
Nick’s job was to make him feel good—not self-conscious. He
got enough of that elsewhere, if he really wanted it. And he
didn’t. Yet he didn’t move away from his position.
“So you’ve been a naughty boy and put something up
your arse by yourself. What size? Are we talking a banana, a
couple fingers, or a silicone horse dick?”
Horse dick ? What was the little bastard thinking? That he was into animals? “Uh. Normal size. Silicone. I don’t do
food.”
Nick snickered. “Or have food do you .” He didn’t
continue, but the silence was now definitely thoughtful. The
caress continued, keeping him in place and calm, yet some of
the tensions had returned with that last question. Nick was
hitting his buttons to gauge his reactions, maybe. Get to know him, his temper, his responses. Damn, the guy was clever. One
of the reasons why Spencer had stayed away from prostitutes
was the idea that they were cheap and nasty and uneducated
and that his hand (or a dildo) really could achieve the same
results—for a lot less money.
I stand corrected.
“Show me your favourite.” Another straightforward
order. Spencer made to get up, but Nick pressed down on his
shoulder again. “Let’s go together.”
It was a bit of an awkward shuffle on his knees, but he
made it to the nightstand. He had a small collection—six in
total, but really only used three of them these days. The mid-
sized, electric-blue, silicone dildo was the one he used the
most; then a similar size in harder plastic that vibrated; and a studded steel dildo with a bulbous head. He used that last
32
one for “rough.” Just the size of the head could reduce him to a sweaty, writhing mess.
“Favourite?”
Spencer cleared his head and reached into the drawer,
hand hovering for a moment. He picked the blue one. It was
the most familiar, the one that required the least preparation.
Something about the brushed steel one made it look absurdly
like a weapon.
“Hand it to me.”
Spencer lifted it up towards Nick’s hand. Nick brushed
his fingers and took the dildo, examined it. “Why that one?”
“It’s just . . . a good size for me.”
“Hmm.” Nick eyed the toy, turning it and tilting his
head to one side, then the other, inspecting it like he was a
goddamned customs agent or something. For the first time
tonight, Nick’s gaze was fixed somewhere other than on
Spencer, but Spencer still felt more conspicuous than he ever
had in his life.
Part of him wanted to demand to know when they
would be through with the games and could get on to what
he’d paid for. But as he watched Nick sizing up the dildo like an executioner picking out a weapon, he had a feeling this
was what he’d paid for. Not just getting fucked, but getting mindfucked.
“Show me,” Nick said again, and held the toy out.
He blinked. “Sorry, what?”
“Show me.” The hand holding the