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that’s such great news, Ember.”  She sits next to me on the couch. “You’ve always been so self conscious about your weight.  This is going to make you feel so good.”
     
    I shrug.  “It was only my first day, so we’ll see how it goes.”
     
    “This calls for celebration,” she says, retrieving her duffle bag and pulling out a bottle of wine.  She goes to the kitchen and comes back holding two glasses of Merlot.  She hands me one and makes her way to the iPod deck in the corner. 
     
    When she turns it on, Dolly Parton’s version of I Will Always Love You comes on.  “What the hell is ‘When Forever Ends’?”  April shuts off Dolly Parton and shoots me an accusatory look.  “I wanted to give you some space while you went through your grieving period, but if I knew it was this bad, I would have staged an intervention.” 
     
    She fiddles with the iPod and puts on Pink’s So What, I’m Still A Rockstar .  “Now that’s a break up song,” she says, sitting next to me on the couch, wine in hand.  “So does this mean you’re coming out of your funk? Because I’ve been trying to give you space—I figured the last thing you need is me and Drew under your feet being all gross and lovey dovey when you’re in the middle of a huge break up.”  She puts her hand on my knee. “But I miss you.”
     
    “Where is Drew, by the way?” I ask.  “I thought you two were attached at the hip.”
     
    “That’s only because I’ve been trying to give you space.”  She reaches for her phone.  “I’ll text him and tell him you and I are hanging out tonight.”
     
    ***
     
    About half way through the bottle of wine, April and I decide to play an old favorite game of ours from when we were kids.
     
    “Truth or dare?” she asks.
     
    “Truth.”  I sip my wine and watch her bite her lip and stare intently at the space above my head, searching for a good question. 
     
    Her eyes light up.  “Tell me about this personal trainer.”  She waggles her eyebrows, knowing me all too well.
     
    “Three words: so fucking hot.  Oh my god, April, you have no idea.  He’s this massive beast of a man with huge muscles and the most manly, gorgeous face ever.”
     
    “I figured. The food journal was a dead giveaway.  You’d never do something like that on your own.  So are you gonna eee-er eee-er eee-er eee-er,” she says, indicating the sound of a creaking bed.
     
    “No!  He’s my trainer, not a male prostitute.  And anyway, I need his help.  There’s something really motivational about having a hot personal trainer.  It’s like you want to impress him, so it motivates you to work extra hard.”
     
    “Mmmm, extra hard.  She waggles her eyebrows again. “Okay, now me—truth or dare.”  Before I can reply she says, “Dare!” She always picks dare, nine times out of ten.
     
    I think for a minute before saying, “Call Drew and tell him—and it has to be convincing—that you had a sex change operation. You used to be a man.”
     
    She nods confidently, grabs her phone and puts it on speakerphone.  It rings three times before he picks up.  “Hey beautiful,” he says.
     
    “Drew, there’s something I need to talk to you about.  It’s serious.”  She has a big smile on her face, and I know he’s never going to believe her.
     
    “Am I on speaker phone?”
     
    “Yeah, Ember’s here.  She’s giving me emotional support so I can admit something very difficult.  I’ve wanted to tell you about this for a long time, but I didn’t know how.”  April looks at me with a huge smile and puts her hand over her mouth.
     
    “What is it?”
     
    “Well, before we met…I wasn’t the person you know today.”
     
    “Okay.”
     
    “I didn’t know how to tell you, but since we’ve gotten so serious, I feel like you deserve to know. I used to be a man. I used to have a peen, but now I have a poon.”
     
    I put a pillow over my face and lay back on the couch to