Read Gooney Bird Is So Absurd for Free Online Page B

Tyrone let off steam, Mrs. Pidgeon had once said.
    " Day goin' by and people start to cry, 'cuz our teacher be gone and the new one make us yawn— "
    " New one make us yawn, " the class chanted, repeating part of Tyrone's rap, as they always did. Malcolm got up from his desk and began to dance.
    " Rub a dub dub, we doan wanna have a sub— " Tyrone continued.
    " Rub a dub dub, " chanted the second-graders.
    "Silence!" shouted Miss Overgaard. The class obeyed at once.
    "Who told you that you could leave your desk?" she said to Malcolm, grabbing his arm. Malcolm began to cry.
    "Permission to speak!" said Gooney Bird loudly and then began to speak before Miss Overgaard replied. "Malcolm is hyperactive and dancing is a good way for him to get it out of his system! Mrs. Pidgeon understands that!"
    "And she underthtandth my thpeech!" Felicia Ann added.
    " And she likes my rap, she doan think I be a sap, " chanted Tyrone.
    "I want Mrs. Pidgeon back!" Chelsea groaned.
    "Me, too!"
    "Me, too!"
    "We all want Mrs. Pidgeon back!" the class wailed.
    Mr. Leroy appeared, suddenly, at the door. "What's the problem here?" he asked. "Mr. Furillo tells me things are not going well in this classroom. Are you giving the substitute teacher a hard time?"
    "Make that former substitute teacher," Miss Overgaard said. She was putting on her coat. "If you think I'm going to stay one more minute in a classroom that puts up with rodents and rappers and people named for albatrosses..."
    She stormed out of the room and slammed the door behind her.
    The children were wide-eyed at their desks.
    "Mr. Leroy," Gooney Bird said, "she was very rude."
    "And we didn't even get to do poetry," Beanie added.
    "We were going to try poems for different voices today," Tricia explained.
    Mr. Leroy looked at his watch. "I think we can manage without an official teacher for a little while. Mr. Furillo and I will be your substitutes today.
    "But, class: I have very sad news for you. Mrs. Pidgeon called. Her mother died late this morning."
    Keiko gasped, put her head in her arms, and began to cry. All of the children looked shocked and sad.
    "Mrs. X!" said Malcolm. "Our room mother!"
    "Mrs. Pidgeon wanted all of you to know, before you saw it in tomorrow's paper." Mr. Leroy went to Keiko's desk and rubbed her head gently while she wept.
    "She was very, very old," Chelsea said.
    "Yes, everybody dies when they get to be very, very old. My dog died when he was thirteen. That's very, very old for a dog," Ben said with a sigh.
    "But thtill it maketh you thad," Felicia Ann pointed out, and Ben nodded.
    " Someone bein' dead gives you sadness in your head, " Tyrone chanted in a mournful way.
    "Mrs. Pidgeon was going to tell us the surprise about her mother's name! But she didn't get a chance to!" Barry Tuckerman reminded them.
    "Oh." Mr. Leroy chuckled. "I think I know the surprise. Mrs. Pidgeon had already told me, and I'll tell it to you." He told the class about their room mother's name and spelled it for them.
    " Xenia? What kind of name is that?" Chelsea put her hands on her hips. Mr. Leroy smiled.
    "It's Greek," he told the class. "Mrs. Pidgeon's grandparents came from Greece, and her mother had a Greek name. I think the name Xenia actually means 'welcoming.'"
    "So when we called her Mrs. X, she really was a Mrs. X!" Barry said.
    Mr. Leroy nodded. "She thought it was funny, actually. And she was planning to tell you that she really had an AT name. But then she became ill and she never had the chance."
    The children became silent again. It made them sad, thinking about never having the chance.
    "Permission to speak?" asked Gooney Bird.
    Mr. Leroy smiled. "You don't need to ask formal permission," he said gently. "We always love to hear what you have to say, Gooney Bird."
    "I have an idea for something we could do for Mrs. Pidgeon."
    "We could make cookies!" Beanie suggested.
    "Or thend flowerth," said Felicia Ann.
    "This is better than cookies and flowers combined," Gooney Bird