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had
printouts from every newspaper and rag on the market; we were the headlines and
front page on all of them. The fuck? Weren't people getting slaughtered in
Syria, how about that Darfur situation fixed that shit yet? No, but these fucks
had all kinds of ideas of how I could fix my shit, suck a dick bitches. When
she showed me the one of that fuck Terry Poole strolling down the street
wearing his wedding ring without a care in the world I lost my shit. Oh no you
don't motherfucker, you fucked my life and you get to walk down the street with
not a care in the world like cock of the block while I hid away in bumfuck
U.S.A? I don't think so. I'm gonna fuck that old douche up, just saying. James
was already making noises about putting something together but he didn't want
to jump the gun until he got all his facts straight so I would wait. But either
way no matter what he found I’m going after that fuck.
    After she left
I spent the rest of the day in the exercise room working off some steam. I only
thought of Suzette about fifty times on the treadmill. I thought about that
sweet little ass of hers that I liked to slap every chance I got, or the way we
used to laugh in bed at night, or playing tug of war with Rex, shit like that.
The happy times we shared with friends and family.
    Was it worth
hanging onto? I don't know could I live with what she'd done? Fuck no could I
give her up? Not in this lifetime.
    Fuck me
sideways.

Chapter
14

 
    "Rack ‘em
Derrick." the guys and I were shooting pool in the game room. Convo was
light thank fuck. We were all about my nephew and his two year old antics,
things in the family bizz, some money talk. If I wanted I could walk the fuck away
from the Wood and live the life of Riley. I had money before I went there and I
would still have it when I left. Let's face it they would never be able to pay
me my net worth to make a movie. By the time I was eighteen I was halfway to
being a billionaire and that was before I'd ever worked a day in my life. Last
year when I turned twenty-five let's just say I could buy a few small nations
and still be set for life, so Hollywood could go fuck itself.
    Except I loved
the fuck out of acting, it was as if that shit was in my blood or some shit I
just ate that shit up.
    My phone rang
in the middle of a shot, after sinking the eight ball I looked at the display
screen and didn't recognize the number. I let it go to voicemail. It would be
just my luck to answer to the tabs, fucking chicken shit bastards. I hit the
replay button for kicks and was surprised as fuck.
    "Hello
Gage, this is Karen O’Reilly I would really appreciate hearing from you at your
earliest convenience." The fuck. Why was Suzette's publicist calling me?
Fuck if I was calling her back. Bitch could wait till the cows come home I
wasn't calling her for shit.
    "Need to
make a call bro?"
    I knew who he
thought that was; Brian could rant all he wanted but I knew he had a soft spot
for Suzette in fact we all did.
    "Nah, I'm
good."
    We played well
into the night and I realized it was my brothers' way of taking care of me,
keeping me occupied so I didn't wallow in my misery or drink myself into a
stupor. Come to think of it I hadn't had a real drink since I came home. I
guess that hearth and home shit really worked. Mom and the girls kept me fed,
the guys kept me occupied with made up bullshit and my nephew Jonathan kept me
on my toes.
    I wondered how
fucked up it was that the sight of him hurt my heart. I wanted to have kids
with Suzette, I'd been ready to start a family and take things a little slow on
the work front. Now that shit was out the fucking window. I couldn't even think
of starting over with someone else, that was the fuckery of it all. I was washed
up and done at the ripe old age of twenty-six. Fuck me.

 
    I slept like a
baby for the first time that night; things were looking better, not great but
better. Suzette was texting me constantly, I was brave enough to read them now
but I