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leaves.
    â€˜No way. I don’t want to see Mum’s cooking again. It was bad enough the first time.’
    â€˜I don’t have the runs.’
    â€˜What’s wrong then?’ he says cautiously.
    I open the door and pull him into the stall. ‘The MP3’s gone weird. Fix it.’
    He wriggles around like there are ants in his pants. ‘I can’t.’
    â€˜How do you know? You hav en’t even looked at it.’ Suddenly he tries to escape, but I grab hold of his shirt.
    â€˜What’s going on?’
    â€˜Nothing,’ he says.
    â€˜Did you do this?’ I hold up the broken MP3 player.
    He looks away. ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about.’
    Whenever Simon tells a lie he starts blinking. I grab him by the chin so I can see his eyes, but he quickly closes them.
    â€˜You had it planned all along, huh?’ I say. ‘You thought I’d get on stage, sing like a strangled cat and look like a fool.’
    â€˜No!’
    I squeeze his chin to convince him to open his eyes, and when he does they blink faster than a lighthouse on steroids.
    He starts whimpering. ‘It’s not fair! Just because you’re bigger than me you think you can order me around.’
    I put my arm around his neck. ‘You’re right. I am bigger than you. And because of this …’ I point to the MP3 player. ‘… I’m gonna prove it every single day of your life.’ I squeeze the soft flesh where the shoulder meets the neck and he gives a yelp.
    â€˜It wasn’t my idea,’ Simon says quickly.
    â€˜What?’ I squeeze harder, hoping to extract some more information.
    â€˜It was Kane. He said he’d give me twenty bucks if I could embarrass you.’
    I let him go. ‘Kane? But he didn’t know—’
    â€˜Of course he did. He knows you can’t sing, and he guessed about the MP3.’
    â€˜You’re lying!’ I say, putting my arm back around his neck.
    â€˜I’m not. I swear.’ He looks at me and his eyes stay wide open.
    Mr Relf barges in. There’s panic in his voice.
    â€˜Come out right now, Tony! You’re on in 46 seconds.’
    â€˜I can’t, sir. I’m still sick. But I’ve got a plan.’ I start taking off my shirt.
    â€˜What is it?’
    â€˜Simon’s gonna fill in for me.’
    â€˜What?’ say Relfy and Simon at the same time.
    â€˜I taught him all of the songs,’ I say. ‘And because we’re brothers, we sound heaps alike. Almost identical, actually.’
    I wrap the shirt around Simon’s shoulders. He starts turning green.
    â€˜Well,’ says Relfy, ‘this is highly unusual, but I suppose there’s no other choice.’
    â€˜You make sure you sing like a rock star,’ I hiss at Simon. ‘You gotta make Kane look bad. And tell him I hope he breaks a leg. For real.’
    Simon doesn’t answer; he also doesn’t move. In fact, he’s so still he could get a job as a statue.
    â€˜What’s wrong?’ I whisper.
    He doesn’t say a word but I can see the answer in his scared, scared eyes. Stage fright. There’s only one way to deal with this.
    WHACK!
    I smack him on the back.
    He snaps out of it and immediately starts doing vocal exercises. ‘Fa, fa, fa, fa, faaaaaa.’
    I join in. ‘Ting, ting, ting, tingggggg.’
    He runs out and I chuckle at the thought of Simon making a fool of himself in front of a bunch of people.
    Then I realise what I’ve done. While I’m sitting on the toilet, Ashleigh will be sitting on my little brother’s lap, kissing him instead of me.
    Far out!

Love Triangle
    In maths I sit next to Gavin Fox. He’s not good to copy off because he’s dumber than me, but he’s good to talk to. He always knows what’s going on.
    â€˜â€¦ and then Laura told me that Jacob doesn’t wear any deodorant, which is why she wouldn’t