Portland Street, and I was walking past the
gardens on Sackville Street when I saw the car.â He put his glasses back on and looked expectantly at Ruth.
âWhich car, Richard?â Ruth asked patiently.
âThe coupé,â he said, in the injured tones of someone who thinks theyâve already made themselves abundantly clear. Poor misguided soul.
âYou saw the car that you had reported stolen in the early hours of Wednesday morning?â
âThatâs right,â he said. âOnly, I wasnât sure right away if it was the same one. It was the right model and the right color, but I couldnât see if it was the right registration number. It had trade plates on, you see.â
âTrade plates,â Ruth repeated as she scribbled. I was intrigued. Any self-respecting car thief would have smacked fake plates on a stolen car right away. I couldnât for the life of me see why theyâd use the red and white plates garages use to shift untaxed cars from one place to another. It was just asking to be noticed.
âYeah, trade plates,â Richard said impatiently. âAnyway, I went over to this car, and I lifted up the trade plate on the front, and it was the same reg as the one that got nicked on Tuesday night,â Richard said triumphantly. He put his glasses on and grinned nervously at both of us. âItâs going to be OK, isnât it?â
Ruth nodded. âWeâll get it sorted out, Richard. Now, are you absolutely certain that this was the same car?â
âI still had the keys on my key-ring,â he said. âIt had one of those little cardboard tags on it with the number of the car, so I wasnât just relying on my memory. It was the identical number. Besides, the key I had opened the car, and there was still one of my tapes in the cassette. Isnât that proof enough?â
âSomehow, I donât think the point at issue is going to be the car,â I muttered quietly. Ruth gave me a look that would have curdled a piña colada.
âDid you call the police and tell them youâd found the car?â Ruth asked.
âWell, I figured that if I wandered off to look for a phone, the guy that had nicked it could easily have had it away again while I was busy talking to the Dibble. So I thought Iâd just repo it myself
and call the cops when I got home,â Richard explained. It wasnât so unreasonable. Even I had to concede that.
âWhat did you do next?â Ruth said.
âWell, I did what any reasonable person would have done,â Richard said. My heart sank. âI took the trade plates off and cobbed them in the gutter.â
âYou cobbed them in the gutter?â Ruth and I chorused, neck and neck in the incredulity stakes.
âOf course I did. They didnât belong to me. Iâm not a thief,â Richard said with a mixture of self-righteousness and naïvety that made my fingers itch with the desire to get round his throat.
âIt didnât occur to you that they might be helpful evidence for the police in catching the car thieves?â Ruth said, all silky savagery.
âNo, it didnât, Iâm sorry. Iâm not like you two. I donât have a criminal sort of mind.â
Ruth looked like she wanted to join me in the lynch mob. âGo on,â she said, her voice icy. âWhat did you do after you disposed of your corroboration?â
âI got in the car and set off. I was nearly home when I saw the flashing blue lights in my rear-view mirror. I didnât even pull over at first, because I wasnât speeding or anything. Anyway, they cut me up at the lights on Upper Brook Street, and I realized it was me they were after. So I stopped. I opened the window a couple of inches, but before I could say anything, one of the busies opened the door and dragged me out of the motor. Next thing I know, Iâm spread-eagled over the bonnet with a pair of handcuffs on and